death after journey

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End-of-Life Stages Timeline

What to expect as someone nears death

• 40 to 90 Days Before
• 1 to 2 Weeks Before
• Days to Hours Before

Frequently Asked Questions

The dying process usually begins well before death takes place. It's common to move through certain end-of-life stages that follow a general timeline.

Being tuned in to the physical, mental, and emotional changes of your loved one can help you recognize the signs that they're dying. Knowing more about the end-of-life process may help you better prepare for what's to come.

Still, nothing about that process is certain or applicable to everyone. The dying journey has several milestones, but not everyone stops at them all. A healthcare practitioner may be able to give you a sense of your loved one's expected timeline as they move through these stages.

This article explains a typical end-of-life timeline and what happens to someone mentally, behaviorally, and physically. While some people may follow this closely, others may cycle through these stages far faster (even within days) or for months.

Signs: 40 to 90 Days Before Death

The dying process often comes into view about one to three months before death. Many of the experiences that take place at this first end-of-life stage are broadly common but the specifics can depend on the individual.

Physical Changes

As the body starts to slow down, a dying person may have the following physical signs:

• Reduced appetite
• Reduced thirst
• Increased sleeping
• Weight loss
• Mild sense of happiness and well-being ( euphoria ) due to natural changes in body chemistry

The reduced appetite and weight loss can be alarming, but it helps to know your loved one isn't suffering in any way by not eating. This is a natural and expected part of their journey.

The reason it's okay is that their body no longer needs as much energy. That need also decreases when they stop regular activities and start sleeping more.

Mental and Behavioral Changes

Social and cultural factors help shape a person's dying experience. For example, gender roles can be a factor.

Talking Openly About Death

Research suggests men are less likely than women to openly talk about their mortality and end-of-life wishes. One reason might be that men find it more difficult to ask for help and don't want to come across as "needy."

These differences aren't necessarily unique to one gender identity, though. Plenty of women struggle to talk about their death and don't want anyone to feel "burdened" by caring for them.

Religious and cultural backgrounds can influence how someone feels about the dying process. Depending on their beliefs, certain practices, rituals, and customs can be steps along the end-of-life timeline.

Withdrawal and Reflection

As they start to accept their mortality and realize death is approaching , they may start to withdraw. They're beginning the process of separating from the world and the people in it.

During this stage, your loved one may say no to visits from friends, neighbors, and even family. When they do accept visitors, it might be hard for them to interact. That may make you feel rejected, which is especially hard when you know your time with the person is limited.

This stage is also one of reflection. The dying person often thinks back over their life and revisits old memories. They might also be going over the things they regret.

Signs: 1 to 2 Weeks Before Death

Verywell / Cindy Chung

The dying process starts to move faster in the last week or two of life. The acceleration can be frightening for loved ones.

As death approaches, you may want to "correct" them if they say things that don't make sense—but it's better not to. At this stage, it's better to listen to and support your loved one rather than to risk upsetting them or starting an argument.

For example, your loved one might say that they see or hear a person who died before them. In those moments, just let your loved one tell you about it.

You might feel frustrated because you can't know for sure whether they're hallucinating, having a spiritual experience, or just getting confused. The uncertainty can be unsettling, but it's part of the process.

At this point in the end-of-life timeline, a dying person's body has a hard time maintaining itself. Your loved one may need help with just about any form of activity.

For example, they may have trouble swallowing medications or refuse to take them. If they have been taking pain medications, they may need liquid morphine now.

During this end-of-life stage, signs that death is near include:

• Body temperature that's one or more degrees lower than normal
• Lower blood pressure
• An irregular pulse that may slow down or speed up
• Increased sweating
• Skin color changes, with lips and nail beds that are pale, bluish, or, in people of color, purplish
• Breathing changes (e.g., a rattling sound and cough)
• Less or no talking
• Sudden arm or leg motions

During this stage of the end-of-life timeline, people tend to:

• Sleep most of the time
• Become confused
• Have altered senses
• Experience delusions (fearing hidden enemies, feeling invincible)
• Continue or begin having hallucinations (seeing or speaking to people who aren't present or who have died)
• Become restless (pick at bedsheets or clothing, have aimless or senseless movements)

It can be hard for you to witness these changes, but it's important that you remain supportive.

Signs: Days to Hours Before Death

In their last days or hours, the dying person may go through several possible stages.

Surge of Energy

The last few days before death can surprise family members. At this stage, your loved one may have a sudden surge of energy. They may want to get out of bed, talk to loved ones, or eat after having no appetite for days or weeks.

You may take these actions as signs that a dying person is getting better, but the energy will soon go away. It can be hurtful to watch this happen but know that this is a common step within the end-of-life timeline. These energy bursts are a dying person's final physical acts before moving on.

The surges of activity are usually short. The previous signs of being close to death return more strongly once the energy has been spent.

Breathing Changes

At this stage, a dying person's breathing becomes slower and less regular. Rapid breaths followed by periods of no breathing at all ( Cheyne-Stokes breathing) may occur. You may also hear a " rattling " sound when they breathe.

These changes can be unpleasant to witness but you should try to remember that these are not signs your loved one is uncomfortable.

Change in Appearance

Your loved one's hands and feet may start looking blotchy, purplish, or mottled. The changes in skin appearance may slowly move up their arms and legs.

Also, their lips and nail beds may turn bluish or purple, and their lips may droop.

Unresponsiveness

At this end-of-life stage, a dying person usually becomes unresponsive. They may have their eyes open but not be able to see their surroundings.

It's widely believed that hearing is the last sense to stop working. Knowing this can remind you that it's still valuable to sit with and talk to your dying loved one during this time.

Reaching the End

When your loved one stops breathing and their heart stops beating, death has occurred. They have reached the end of their journey.

Signs can be evident one to three months to three months before someone's death. Physical, mental, and behavioral changes are common.

In the week or two before death, the dying process speeds up. They may start being confused and periodically not making sense. Their bodily process may slow down or become erratic, but the person may also appear restless.

In the final days or hours of life, many people have a brief surge of energy and seem like they're doing better. However, once the surge passes, they may appear worse. You may notice breathing changes and skin discoloration.

Knowing these signs may help you prepare for your the end of a loved one's life and bring you comfort as you face the physical and mental changes that happen along the end-of-life timeline.

A Word From Verywell

Supporting a loved one at the end of their life can be difficult, but you don't have to go through it alone. Reach out to a hospice , social worker, or clergy member to help you navigate the process. They can help you recognize and understand some of the changes that are happening as your loved one moves through the process of death.

The pre-active stage of dying can last around two to three weeks. That said, there are many factors that contribute to how long the entire process of dying takes for each person, such as their illness and medications.

There are some physical signs at the end of life that means a person will die soon, including:

• Breathing changes (e.g., shortness of breath and wet respirations )
• Cold hands and feet 
• Constipation
• Decreased appetite and thirst
• Incontinence
• Restlessness

As the body slows down to prepare for death, the metabolism slows down and requires less food. The digestive tract is also less active, which means a dying person won't feel hungry or thirsty.

When a person near the end of life stops eating entirely, it is a sign that death is near. It can be as quick as a few days or up to 10 days. However, some people survive for a few weeks after they stop eating.

That's not necessary and is a personal choice. A dying person will become unconscious, but that does not always mean they are completely unaware of their surroundings. It may bring you (and perhaps, them) some comfort to stay, if you'd like to.

Foundation of America. Signs of Approaching Death .

Hospice Foundation of America. A Caregiver's Guide to the Dying Process .

Skulason B, Hauksdottir A, Ahcic K, Helgason AR. Death talk: gender differences in talking about one’s own impending death .  BMC Palliative Care . 2014;13(1). doi:10.1186/1472-684x-13-8

Hartogh GD. Suffering and dying well: on the proper aim of palliative care . Med Health Care Philos . 2017;20(3):413-424. doi:10.1007/s11019-017-9764-3

Department of Health, Victoria Government. Managing Physical Symptoms During Palliative Care ,

Wholihan D. Seeing the light: End-of-life experiences-visions, energy surges, and other death bed phenomena . Nurs Clin North Am . 2016;51(3):489-500. doi:10.1016/j.cnur.2016.05.005

Marie Curie Foundation. Final Moments of Life .

Blundon EG, Gallagher RE, Ward LM. Electrophysiological evidence of preserved hearing at the end of life . Sci Rep . 2020;10(1):10336. doi:10.1038/s41598-020-67234-9

Hospice Foundation of America. Signs of approaching death .

By Angela Morrow, RN Angela Morrow, RN, BSN, CHPN, is a certified hospice and palliative care nurse.

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Here’s What Happens to Your Soul in the Afterlife

• By Chris Butler
• Published on April 13, 2024
• Last modified March 19, 2024

Survivors of near-death experiences have reported what happened, giving scientists a good idea of what lies beyond.

What happens to our soul after death is a mystery that has captivated human thought and spirituality for millennia. Across different cultures and religions, there have been numerous interpretations and beliefs about the soul’s journey beyond the physical realm. The question of what happens in the afterlife not only considers the depths of spiritual and religious beliefs. Instead, it also intersects with modern scientific inquiry, particularly through the study of near-death experiences (NDEs).

In exploring this enigmatic journey, we tread a delicate line between the known and the unknown, the scientific and the mystical. The soul, the essence of our being, transcends the physicality of life. Many believe it will embark on a journey that continues after our earthly demise.

Religious and spiritual traditions around the world provide diverse perspectives on the afterlife. 

Complementing these spiritual perspectives, scientific studies, particularly those focusing on near-death experiences, offer a fascinating glimpse into what might happen at the threshold of life and death. Researchers have found patterns and experiences that challenge our understanding of consciousness and its ties to the physical world.  Studies have documented  experiences of individuals who, at the brink of death, have reported these vividly recalled sensations:

• Out-of-body experiences
• Traveling through tunnels
• Encountering ethereal beings
• Reviewing their lives​​​​​​.

We’ll cover more of each of those later…

For ages, the soul’s journey has been a matter of faith. However, the recollections and stories of NDE survivors appear to support the afterlife, taught by many organized religions.

Understanding Near-Death Experiences

Near-death experiences (NDEs) are intriguing phenomena that occur at the edge of life and death, offering a unique lens by which we can explore the potential journey of the soul after death. These experiences, typically happening in life-threatening situations, provide profound insights that bridge the gap between scientific inquiry and spiritual exploration.

Defining Near-Death Experiences

NDEs are complex, deeply transformative experiences that occur when an individual is close to death or in a situation where death is imminent.  Greyson  (2007) and  Blanke et al.  (2009) have contributed significantly to understanding NDEs, describing them as a set of cognitive and emotional experiences reported by individuals on the brink of death. These experiences are not mere hallucinations or dreams. Rather, they are vivid, intense, and often life-altering encounters. They also challenge our understanding of consciousness and reality.

Common Features of NDEs

One of the most striking aspects of NDEs is their common features across different cultures and individuals. These experiences, as explained to researchers , often include:

• Out-of-Body Experiences: Individuals report a sensation of separating from their physical bodies and observing themselves and their surroundings from an external vantage point.
• Traveling Through a Tunnel: Many recall moving through a dark tunnel toward a light source.
• Life Review: NDEs commonly involve a rapid, detailed review of one’s life, encompassing significant and trivial events.
• Encountering a Bright Light: Descriptions of encountering a bright, often comforting light are frequent in NDE accounts.

These features are not random occurrences. Rather, they tap into a deeper, universal aspect of human consciousness.

The Soul’s Journey in NDEs

The exploration of near-death experiences (NDEs) provides us with a multi-faceted view of what the soul might encounter in the afterlife. These experiences, as documented in various case reports, reveal a rich tapestry of emotional, cognitive, spiritual, and supernatural elements that could offer glimpses into the soul’s journey beyond life.

Categorization of NDEs

NDEs can be categorized into several distinct but interconnected experiences:

• Emotional Experiences: These include profound feelings of peace, joy, and unconditional love. Individuals often describe a sense of overwhelming compassion and a deep emotional connection with the universe.
• Cognitive Experiences: These involve heightened awareness, vivid thought processes, and sometimes a rapid review of one’s life. There is often a clarity of thought that surpasses normal experiences.
• Spiritual and Religious Experiences: These are characterized by encounters with spiritual beings or a divine presence, feelings of oneness with the universe, or experiences that align with the individual’s religious beliefs.
• Supernatural Experiences: Commonly reported are out-of-body experiences, traveling through tunnels, and metaphysical perceptions that defy the normal laws of physics.

Significance of the Most Frequent NDE Elements

Among these elements, the sensation of leaving the body is particularly significant. It symbolizes a detachment from the physical realm and a transition to a different state. This experience is often the first indication to the individual that they are undergoing something extraordinary, transcending normal conscious experience.

The experience of traveling through a tunnel toward a light often represents a journey to a different realm of existence. This element of NDEs could symbolize the soul’s transition from the physical world to an afterlife or a different plane of existence.

Implications for the Soul’s Journey in the Afterlife

These elements of NDEs provide compelling insights into what the soul might encounter after death. The emotional and cognitive experiences suggest a state of heightened consciousness and emotional fulfillment. In contrast, the spiritual and supernatural experiences hint at the possibility of an existence beyond the physical world.

The findings from a systematic analysis of NDE  case reports  reinforce that these experiences are not random or isolated incidents. Instead, they represent a consistent pattern that many individuals encounter at the brink of death. This consistency across different cultures and individuals suggests that these experiences might be fundamental aspects of the human experience of death and, potentially, the soul’s journey in the afterlife.

Those Scientific Studies Closely Match What Theologians Explain About the Soul in the Afterlife

Theological perspectives on what happens to the soul after death vary widely among religions and spiritual traditions. These beliefs provide diverse and profound insights into the nature of the soul and its journey beyond physical life.

Christianity and a Heavenly Afterlife

In Christian theology, the soul is considered immortal and is believed to face judgment after death. The outcome of this judgment leads to heaven or hell. In the traditional teachings of the Catholic and Eastern Orthodox faiths, the soul may spend some time in repentance in purgatory. Heaven is seen as a place of eternal peace and communion with God, while hell is perceived as a state of eternal separation from God and suffering.

Islam and Heaven 

Islamic teachings also emphasize the immortality of the soul and its judgment after death. The soul is believed to enter an intermediate state, known as Barzakh, until the Day of Judgment. On this day, souls are judged and sent to either Paradise (Jannah) or Hell (Jahannam), depending on their deeds in the earthly life.

Hinduism and Reincarnation in the Afterlife

Hindu beliefs about the afterlife are closely tied to karma and reincarnation. The soul, or Atman, is seen as eternal and cycles through various lives based on its karma. The ultimate goal is to achieve Moksha, a liberation from the cycle of rebirth, and unite with Brahman, the universal soul or ultimate reality.

Buddhism and Rebirth

In Buddhism, the concept of an eternal soul is not emphasized. Instead, the focus is on the cycle of rebirth driven by karma. The aim is to attain Nirvana, a state of liberation from the cycle of suffering and rebirth, achieved through spiritual practices and following the Eightfold Path.

Judaism and an Afterlife

Jewish beliefs about the afterlife are diverse and not as explicitly defined as in other religions. Generally, Judaism focuses more on life and ethical conduct during time spent on Earth than on the specifics of the afterlife. However, there is a belief  a heavenly world to come.

Sikhism teaches that the soul is part of the divine and is on a journey through various lifetimes. The goal is to merge with the divine (Waheguru) through living a righteous life, remembering God, and serving humanity.

Each theological perspective offers a unique view of the soul’s journey after death, reflecting the diverse understandings and teachings across various cultures and traditions. They provide rich spiritual contexts through which individuals interpret the meaning of life and death and the nature of the soul’s existence beyond the physical realm.

Final Thoughts on What Happens to Your Soul in the Afterlife

While NDEs occur at the brink of death, they provide valuable insights into what the soul might experience in the afterlife. NDEs’ characteristics, such as detachment from the body, moving through a tunnel, and encountering beings of light, are commonly reported across different cultures and demographics. These experiences often lead to profound changes in  individuals’ perspectives  on life and death, suggesting a deep, transformative encounter that resonates with their understanding of the soul.

The soul’s journey after death remains a mystery, one that forms a triangle between science, spirituality, and personal belief. The studies of NDEs offer a fascinating window into this journey, suggesting that our consciousness, or soul, might embark on a profound and transformative journey beyond our physical existence. As we explore and understand these experiences, we may come closer to unraveling the enigma of the soul’s journey after death.

But for now, it should comfort faithful people across many religions that science seems to concur that there is a soul journey into an afterlife.  What we may find when we get to the next step of our soul’s journey remains a mystery.

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About the Author

Chris Butler

Chris is a happy dad and co-creator here at PoP. Since 2009, Chris has experienced multiple life changing positive events, released over 100 pounds, attained inner peace, created academic and professional success, and learned to see increased abundance in every area of life, while remaining grateful and joyous through the journey. Chris has transformed from rock bottom in the areas of personal health, fitness, and spirituality. He credits it all to the power of positive thoughts, words, actions and reactions.

In his spare time, Chris enjoys music, fitness, plant-based nutrition and inspiring others to take positive action steps and catch their own dreams in life. Chris also loves to spend quality time with his lovely wife Kristen and two beautiful daughters.

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5 who survived cardiac arrest describe what they saw and heard before reviving

Every year, more than 350,000 people have a cardiac arrest outside of a hospital . Few survive. While many people who have been resuscitated have no memories of the experience, a recent study suggests others recall something , whether it’s a vague sense that people are around them, or more specific dreamlike awareness. 

Unlike a heart attack where people are awake and the heart is still painfully beating, those in cardiac arrest are always unconscious. They have no heartbeat or pulse and need CPR urgently. In essence, they have “flat-lined” and are so near death there is no activity on electronic monitors.

What a near-death experience is has never really been defined. Researchers have been trying to explore what’s happening when a patient’s heart stops to see if there are themes or patterns of consciousness.

“There is an assumption that because people do not respond to us physically, in other words, when they’re in a coma, that they’re not conscious, and that’s fundamentally flawed," said Dr. Sam Parnia, a pulmonary and critical care specialist at NYU Langone Health, and the lead author of the recent study.

To find out more about the experiences of the few survivors who have a sense of consciousness during heart-related near-death events, NBC News connected with participants in the NYU Langone research and others from the Cardiac Arrest Survivor Alliance online community, a program of the Sudden Cardiac Arrest Foundation, and the Near-Death Experience Research Foundation .

They shared what they saw, heard and felt during resuscitation, how their lives changed afterward and what they believe other people should know about death and dying.

"Calm, quiet, peaceful"

Greg Kowaleski, a father of three who lives in Ann Arbor, Michigan, was 47 and playing a pick-up ice hockey game when he collapsed on the rink. Fortunately for Kowaleski, a pediatric cardiologist who is a good friend of his happened to be there, skating for the opposing team.

Dr. Jeff Zampi determined that Kowaleski didn’t have a pulse and immediately began chest compressions. Using an automated external defibrillator, or AED, Zampi was able to shock his friend’s heart back into a normal rhythm. 

Although the cardiac arrest was in 2021, Kowaleski still recalls the “incredibly vivid” memory he had while Zampi was resuscitating him. Kowaleski found himself boarding an airplane that was completely empty, the blue seats stretching out in front of him.

“The sun is really bright outside, like a beautiful day and I sit down next to the window in my seat, looking out on the tarmac,” he said. 

“As I’m sitting there waiting, I hear somebody call my name,” he said. “It’s my friend Jeff.”

In the memory, Zampi told him he was on the wrong flight and needed to get off. “I got up and I followed him out of the plane,” he said. “And then as we’re getting off the plane, boom! I came back. I woke up.”

Since then, Kowaleski said he’s struggled a little bit with what exactly the experience meant.

“The place where I went, wherever it was, I will say it was extremely peaceful,” he said. “I don’t know that I’ve ever experienced anything so calm, quiet, peaceful.”

What he does know is that he doesn’t really fear death anymore.

“It’s not a scary, bad place to go, wherever I was.” 

"There was no gender"

In 2016, Em James Arnold, a parent in New York City, had a cardiac arrest and was revived.

Arnold’s girlfriend started CPR, but the resuscitation lasted 90 minutes and required nine defibrillator shocks. A combined team of FDNY firefighters and FDNY emergency medical services crews responded to the 911 call, which was made by Arnold’s 12-year-old daughter.

During the near-death experience, the cardiac arrest survivor — who was assigned male at birth and now prefers they/them pronouns — had a profound and life-changing memory.

Arnold remembers traveling feet-first over an expanse of water, floating on what seemed to be a stone-like surface. Overhead was an endless sky, and Arnold felt completely safe, free of fear, and neither male nor female.

Arnold, now 53, has had gender dysphoria since about the age of 3 or 4, although they didn’t always know there was a name for the feeling that one’s gender identity doesn’t match the one registered at birth.

“For me, that was like a lifelong puzzle," Arnold said. "And then, when I go into cardiac arrest and I’m in that water, there was no gender, so there was no assignment there. It allowed me to embrace that of myself.” 

After waking from a three-day coma and a long hospitalization, doctors gave Arnold an implantable cardioverter-defibrillator, or ICD, a battery-operated implanted device that can shock the heart if necessary. Two years later they had surgery to repair a damaged heart valve.

After the experience, Arnold began emerging out and presenting as mixgender/transgender and, soon after, married their girlfriend.

“She’s the one who walked me through this, as she constantly says to me, be yourself, be yourself, just be yourself,” Arnold said. “That’s the hardest thing for anybody to do.”

The couple has a new baby, now 8 months. The cardiac arrest “helped me understand that gender is nothing,” Arnold said. 

Like opening your eyes in a cave

Zach Lonergan, a 32-year-old scientist who lives in Pasadena, California, was regularly logging 15- to 18-mile runs with his friends as they prepared for the Los Angeles Marathon.

As part of the training, they all decided to run the Rose Bowl Half Marathon.

“We’re like, oh, 13 miles for a half marathon is no big deal,” Lonergan said.

However, when race day came in January, Lonergan wasn’t feeling well.

“Of course, I ignored my symptoms and decided to run a really fast race,” he said.

Despite feeling tired for the last few miles, he crossed the finish line. When he went to pick up his medal, he collapsed.

Without a pulse or heart beat, emergency workers performed CPR and shocked Lonergan's heart twice. 

Lonergan doesn’t remember the collapse.

He does recall being awake and aware in a dark place that was unfamiliar, describing it like opening your eyes in a cave. 

“It felt strange, but at the same time, it was the most peaceful time of my entire life,” he said. “In this darkness, I felt extremely warm, and extremely peaceful.” 

After he was resuscitated, doctors gave him an ICD implant that would shock the heart, if necessary.

After he recovered, Lonergan did feel some anxiety, especially when it came to running. However, he also recalls it being a time of “prolonged peacefulness.”

Grateful to be alive, he no longer feared death. He took a “reunion tour” to reconnect with friends he hadn’t seen in years. 

“You only get one life and you have to cherish the people you have around you,” he said. “I think that’s been the biggest gift that I’ve gotten.”

"All-surrounding sense of love"

Dr. Melinda Greer, 65, was being evaluated for chest pain at a cardiac intensive care unit when her heart stopped. Greer, a retired pediatrician in Tahlequah, Oklahoma, had asystole, a failure of the heart’s electrical system which causes the heart to stop pumping, or flat-line.

That was 10 years ago. She is finally opening up about what she feels was a positive experience.

As the nurse was performing CPR on her, Greer saw an “incredible white light” and felt “an incredible all-encompassing, all-surrounding sense of love.” 

She felt like she had returned to a “place that felt like home to me, and I was back amongst a group of what I can only call beings, because we weren’t physical, that I considered my group.” 

It was “a wonderful experience," she said. "I really was angry when they brought me back.”

After Greer left the hospital, she decided to retire early, focusing on creative pursuits and new experiences, rather than acquiring things. She encourages people to get more involved in the “positive aspects of living in a beautiful world.”

“Feel the wind, get out in nature, take off your shoes and socks and put your feet firmly on the ground and just listen to that inner voice, that’s what I would recommend," she said. "I wish I’d done it long ago.”

"I knew I could not leave them”

Connie Fuller, 55, lives in Warrior, Alabama, just north of Birmingham. In 2020, Fuller was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. In 2021, she and her husband made the hard decision to sell their swimming pool business to spend more time together. But the day of the sale was particularly stressful, and she started having chest pain.

She was admitted to the hospital for observation, although tests had ruled out a heart attack. It was at this point that she developed bradycardia, an abnormally slow heart rate, and her heart stopped.

Fuller doesn’t remember when the nurse started CPR. She didn’t feel any pain, although she found out later that the nurse broke her sternum and several ribs, a common occurrence during CPR.

“I love her, she saved my life," Fuller said.

What Fuller does remember is hearing her husband’s voice when he came back into the room.

“We started dating when I was 14, he was 16," she said. "He sounded like that little 16-year-old boy. That was the voice that I heard."

She feels that her husband’s voice helped pull her back into her body, as the medical team worked to revive her.

“I do remember thinking, this feels so good and so peaceful and it’s so calm and there’s no worries here,” she said. “But at the same time, I remembered my husband and my daughter and I knew I could not leave them.”

Based on her experience, Fuller advises family members to talk to patients, even when it seems they are dying.

“If it’s safe, and possible — allow the family members to be there to talk to the patient,” she said.

Fuller, who believes in God, wondered why she didn’t have experiences that are more like the traditional concept of heaven.

“Psychologically it’s been a lot to handle,” she said. "I thought, why wasn’t I in heaven? Why didn’t I see my relatives? Why didn’t I see the white light? You know, why didn’t that happen for me?”

Fuller turned out to have takotsubo cardiomyopathy, or broken heart syndrome , which is a weakness of the heart muscle that can be caused by severe stress.

“I thought at that time I had wasted my heartbeats worrying about a swimming pool store," Fuller said. "That’s when I prayed and I begged God, please give me one more chance to not waste any more heartbeats on something that’s not important. I won’t. I will not do that again.”

Theresa Tamkins is a health reporter and editor who has worked for BuzzFeed News, Health.com and Reuters Health. She covers infectious disease, fitness, nutrition and mental health, and has written for CNN, The Lancet, MSNBC, and WebMD, among others.

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'I crossed over': Survivors of near-death experiences share 'afterlife' stories

For many, the question of what happens when we die is a mysterious one — a TODAY survey found that 55 percent of people are absolutely certain there is an afterlife, 37 percent are not certain, and 8 percent are certain there isn't an afterlife.

But for some who have been through near-death experiences, the question has a clear answer.

Take public speaker Anita Moorjani, who shared her story with Maria Shriver on TODAY.

"I believe that I died, yes — that I crossed over into the afterlife and back," said Moorjani, adding that the afterlife is "like being in a really unlimited space and time."

RELATED: 'Impossible' love story comes true after woman's brush with death

Diagnosed with lymphoma in 2002, Moorjani — who considers herself more spiritual than religious — was losing her cancer battle, withering down to just 85 pounds and battling tumors from the base of her skull to her abdomen. She slipped into a coma in February 2006.

She said that’s when she died and crossed over to an afterlife.

“I felt as though I was above my body,” she said. “It was like I had 360-degree peripheral vision of the whole area around. But not just in the room where my body was in, but beyond the room.”

According to Moorjani, the author of the new book "Dying To Be Me" , she was reunited in that state with her late father, who told her to turn back.

“He said that I've gone as far as I can, and if I go any further, I won't be able to turn back,” she said. “But I felt I didn't want to turn back, because it was so beautiful. It was just incredible, because, for the first time, all the pain had gone. All the discomfort had gone. All the fear was gone. I just felt so incredible. And I felt as though I was enveloped in this feeling of just love. Unconditional love.”

Citing an “incredible clarity where everything started to make sense,” she said she decided to return to her body because she believed “it would heal very, very quickly.” It did.

“Within four days, my tumors shrunk by 70 percent, and the doctors were shocked,” she said. “And I kept telling everyone that, ‘I know I'm going to be okay. I know it’s not my time to die.’”

Moorjani isn’t alone in connecting a "crossing over" experience to healing.

Diagnosed at age 4 with a chronic digestive disorder, 8-year-old Annabel Beam experienced intense pain and frequent hospital visits. “She was always so sweet and gracious,” her father, Kevin, told TODAY. “She wasn't making a big deal out of it, and she was suffering in silence.”

But the suffering started to overwhelm Annabel.

RELATED: Doctor claims he has evidence of the afterlife

“I told my mom, ‘Mama, I want to die, and go to heaven with Jesus where there is no more pain. I don't want to be in this much pain for the rest of my life,’” she said. “And so I was so committed to just giving up that sometimes whenever I couldn't sleep I'd kinda try and figure out what would happen if I did die. Then I decided, my mom would come with me. My dad would stay and watch my sisters.”

Annabel’s mother, Christy, refused to believe what she’d heard. “I remember thinking, ‘That's not what she said,’” Christy recalled. “She doesn't know anything about giving up. She's a fighter.”

Days later, Annabel said she fell 30 feet from a tree branch that cracked while she was sitting on it with her sister, Abbie. She claims that after bumping her head three times on the way down and falling into the hollowed-out base of the tree, she died and went to heaven.

RELATED: Read an excerpt of Annabel's story from 'Miracles from Heaven' here

“It was really bright, and I sat on Jesus’ lap and he told me, ‘Whenever the firefighters get you out, there will be nothing wrong with you,’” Annabel recalled. “And I asked him if I could stay and he said, ‘No, I have plans you need to fulfill on Earth that you cannot fulfill in heaven.’”

A few days later, she told her family about her experience.

“She was very matter-of-fact: very ‘This is what happened,’ not at all animated, just, ‘Here are the facts,’” Christy said. “And then she stopped talking, and looked out the window for the rest of the trip.”

Now symptom-free, Annabel has gone from taking 10 daily medications to none.

"She fell 30 feet head first, without any injuries or one bug bite,” her mom said. “She came out of that tree hours later wet, muddy, and with scratches. And she’s well.”

RELATED: Before his death, teenager's IV pole project changed lives for kids with cancer

The tree, which toppled due to weather, remains in the Beam family front yard, beside a cross Kevin carved after the accident.

“I’m glad that I didn’t ever try and cut it down,” he said. “I do think that this tree was actively involved in a miracle.”

His wife — who turned Annabel’s story into the book “Miracles from Heaven” which has now been turned into a major motion picture of the same name — agreed. “It had a purpose,” Christy said. “It was a vessel.”

Annabel, who continues to climb trees, feels fortunate. “Most kids aren’t ever healed,” she said. “And so anytime I see [the tree], I'm just grateful, and happy.”

This story was originally published in April 2015.

Unconscious

What happens after death, three viewpoints expressed by my teenage patients..

Posted February 11, 2023 | Reviewed by Tyler Woods

• What Is the Unconscious
• Find a therapist near me
• A common view is that after death, the soul ascends to heaven.
• Some are certain about the lack of existence after death and believe this makes life all the more beautiful.
• A humble position is to accept that what happens after death is unknowable.

Children often bring up the subject of death in my counseling practice. Some children in their middle elementary school years report a fear of dying and sometimes express worry about falling asleep because they or their family members might die overnight. More frequently, teenagers bring up the topic of death in the context of coming to grips with having a finite life and asking about its meaning.

Many of my patients who bring up the topic deal with anxiety , but some deal with the loss or impending loss of a loved one, including a pet. Some patients have a serious or terminal medical illness that brings death closer to home.

Studies have shown that children develop views on death based on how it is presented to them. If death is presented as resulting from a cessation of biological function, young children are more apt to think of death in biological terms than when death is explained in an afterlife context, e.g., “Your grandmother is now with God.” However, as they age, children and adults often adopt two parallel stances about death involving a biological and an afterlife or religious stance (Harris, 2018).

In this post, I present the views of representative teenagers from my practice, including brief excerpts of the discussions I have had with them.

A common view expressed by many of my patients is that after death, their souls will go to heaven. These patients also mostly believe that their pets will go to heaven. However, very few say they can explain what happens in heaven. They are of split opinion regarding whether they can interact with the souls of loved ones in heaven.

For grieving patients who believe in the afterlife, I offer the opportunity to use hypnosis to interact with their loved ones. Most patients take up this opportunity, including those who say they are unsure whether interactions are possible with the deceased. After they imagine such an interaction, most patients report that it felt real and that they feel better about the loss of their loved one.

Some patients wonder how heaven can be real if different religions view the afterlife differently. We discuss that religions represent mankind’s attempts to make sense of the world and define principles we should live. I suggest that since people have promulgated religions, the guidance they offer may be imperfect and inconsistent within each religion or in comparison with other religions, even if God originally inspired it.

There Is Nothing After Death

A view expressed by a minority of my patients is that existence ceases at death. They explain that they believe there is no ability to feel, think, or perceive anything after death. Some express that life is pointless as it has no inherent meaning.

I share that a few of my patients believe that the lack of existence after death makes life all the more beautiful. They suggest that the fragility of life can serve as an impetus to make the most out of it.

We discuss that our perception of reality is limited by what our brains have been geared to handle. For example, we know a lot that we cannot perceive, such as light or sound, that is out of range of our brain’s ability to register. It also is reasonable to assume that there are many things we cannot perceive, of which we are unaware. Thus, rather than a position of certainty about the lack of existence after death, it may be more humble to hold an agnostic position: It is unknowable what happens after death.

Uncertainty

My remaining patients state they do not know what happens after death, and many are bothered by this ambiguity.

I ask my patients if they want to find out whether they can develop a different understanding of what happens after death. If they are interested, I offer to interview their subconscious and typically ask the following questions:

Did you exist before the patient was born? The majority of my patients’ subconscious responds affirmatively.

Will you exist after the patient dies? Nearly all of the subconscious responds affirmatively.

If patients have questions for their subconscious, we pose them. Whether the subconscious responses to these questions represent a reality regarding existence after death or the patients’ wishful thinking, from a clinical standpoint, it is apparent that this exercise is useful as patients report feeling better.

Finally, I often share a story I wrote as an 18-year-old when I grappled with the same questions.

The Potion-Maker

The main character of this story is the potion-maker who has a shop that contains all the potions that might exist. He offers a potion of everlasting life for free to a young man who has come into the shop. The young man inquired whether the potion-maker knew if there is life after death.

“Why yes, I do,” answered the potion-maker, gesturing toward a massive book on his shelf. “I have determined that there is definitely no life after death.”

In response to the young man’s question, the potion-maker stated that he has not taken the potion.

“But why not?”

“The reason is quite simple,” explained the potion-maker. “Life is just too long if it lasts an eternity. I would see everything, do everything, gain everything, lose everything, and then I would still need to exist for an eternity with nothing new to do.”

The young man thanked the potion-maker for his honesty but declined to take the potion.

Sometime later, a young lady entered the shop and inquired about the potion or everlasting life. She, too, wanted to know if there is life after death.

“I have looked at that question long and hard, “replied the potion-maker. “And I have reached the conclusion that it is impossible to reach a conclusion regarding this question.”

The young lady mused, “There are so many things I want to do. It would simply be marvelous to live forever.”

The potion-maker interjected, “But what if there is a heaven? Would you not be missing your chance to go there if you lived forever on this Earth?”

The young lady decided to pass on the opportunity to live forever.

Finally, an old man rushed into the store and demanded the potion of everlasting life.

“But wait,” said the potion-maker. “Don’t be hasty. Should you not consider that I have proven that there is life after death? I’ve even proven there is a heaven.”

“Yes,” said the old man irritably. “I already know that heaven exists. And I also know that there is a hell. And that’s where I’ll be going if I do not live forever. For you see, I have committed a terrible crime .”

“I see,” said the potion-maker. “You wish to live forever so that you can escape eternal damnation?”

“Yeah,” replied the old man. “Can I have the potion now?”

“Certainly.” The potion-maker gave the old man a bottle of black bubbling liquid.

The old man turned away from the counter and looked out the door of the shop as he greedily drank the potion. He started feeling better within a few moments.

“Am I going to live forever now?” he asked.

“Yes,” replied the devil.

The potion-maker story often serves as a platform for my patients to further discuss their ideas.

I share with my patients that I believe the mystery of death is one of the gifts we have been given by virtue of being sentient beings. This mystery can prompt us to carefully consider what we want to achieve in our limited existence on this Earth and gives us a better perspective regarding what is truly important in our lives.

Harris, Paul, L. 2018. Children’s understanding of death: from biology to religion. Phil Trans R Soc B , 373: 20170266.

More information about how patients deal with questions relating to death can be found in the 2021 book, "Changing Children’s Lives with Hypnosis: A Journey to the Center," by Ran D. Anbar, Lanham, MD: Rowman & Littlefield.

Ran D. Anbar, M.D., FAAP, is board-certified in both pediatric pulmonology and general pediatrics. He is the author of the new book Changing Children’s Lives with Hypnosis: A Journey to the Center .

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The Journey Through Grief

The Mourner's Six "Reconciliation Needs"

by Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D.

The death of someone loved changes our lives forever. And the movement from the "before" to the "after" is almost always a long, painful journey. From my own experiences with loss as well as those of the thousands of grieving people I have worked with over the years, I have learned that if we are to heal we cannot skirt the outside edges of our grief. Instead, we must journey all through it, sometimes meandering the side roads, sometimes plowing directly into its raw center.

I have also learned that the journey requires mourning. There is an important difference, you see. Grief is what you think and feel on the inside after someone you love dies. Mourning is the outward expression of those thoughts and feelings. To mourn is to be an active participant in our grief journeys. We all grieve when someone we love dies, but if we are to heal, we must also mourn.

There are six "yield signs" you are likely to encounter on your journey through grief - what I call the "reconciliation needs of mourning." For while your grief journey will be an intensely personal, unique experience, all mourners must yield to this set of basic human needs if they are to heal.

Need 1. Acknowledging the reality of the death. This first need of mourning involves gently confronting the reality that someone you care about will never physically come back into your life again. Whether the death was sudden or anticipated, acknowledging the full reality of the loss may occur over weeks and months. To survive, you may try to push away the reality of the death at times. You may discover yourself replaying events surrounding the death and confronting memories, both good and bad. This replay is a vital part of this need of mourning. It's as if each time you talk it out, the event is a little more real. Remember - this first need of mourning, like the other five that follow, may intermittently require your attention for months. Be patient and compassionate with yourself as you work on each of them.

Need 2. Embracing the pain of the loss. This need of mourning requires us to embrace the pain of our loss - something we naturally don't want to do. It is easier to avoid, repress or deny the pain of grief than it is to confront it, yet it is in confronting our pain that we learn to reconcile ourselves to it.

You will probably discover that you need to "dose" yourself in embracing your pain. In other words, you cannot (nor should you try to) overload yourself with the hurt all at one time. Sometimes you may need to distract yourself from the pain of death, while at other times you will need to create a safe place to move toward it. Unfortunately, our culture tends to encourage the denial of pain. If you openly express your feelings of grief, misinformed friends may advise you to "carry on" or "keep your chin up." If, on the other hand, you remain "strong" and "in control," you may be congratulated for "doing well" with your grief. Actually, doing well with your grief means becoming well acquainted with your pain.

Need 3. Remembering the person who died. Do you have any kind of relationship with someone when they die? Of course. You have a relationship of memory. Precious memories, dreams reflecting the significance of the relationship and objects that link you to the person who died (such as photos, souvenirs etc.) are examples of some of the things that give testimony to a different form of a continued relationship. This need of mourning involves allowing and encouraging yourself to pursue this relationship. But some people may try to take your memories away. Trying to be helpful, they encourage you to take down all the photos of the person who died. They tell you to keep busy or even to move out of your house. But in my experience, remembering the past makes hoping for the future possible. Your future will become open to new experiences only to the extent that you embrace the past.

Need 4. Developing a new self-identity. Part of your self-identity comes from the relationships you have with other people. When someone with whom you have a relationship dies, your self-identity, or the way you see yourself, naturally changes. You may have gone from being a "wife" or "husband" to a "widow" or "widower." You may have gone from being a "parent" to a "bereaved parent." The way you define yourself and the way society defines you is changed. A death often requires you to take on new roles that had been filled by the person who died. After all, someone still has to take out the garbage, someone still has to buy the groceries. You confront your changed identity every time you do something that used to be done by the person who died. This can be very hard work and can leave you feeling very drained. You may occasionally feel child-like as you struggle with your changing identity. You may feel a temporarily heightened dependence on others as well as feelings of helplessness, frustration, inadequacy and fear.

Many people discover that as they work on this need, they ultimately discover some positive aspects of their changed self-identity. You may develop a renewed confidence in yourself, for example. You may develop a more caring, kind and sensitive part of yourself. You may develop an assertive part of your identity that empowers you to go on living even though you continue to feel a sense of loss.

Need 5. Searching for meaning. When someone you love dies, you naturally question the meaning and purpose of life. You probably will question your philosophy of life and explore religious and spiritual values as you work on this need. You may discover yourself searching for meaning in your continued living as you ask "How?" and "Why" questions. "How could God let this happen?" "Why did this happen now, in this way?" The death reminds you of your lack of control. It can leave you feeling powerless. The person who died was a part of you. This death means you mourn a loss not only outside of yourself, but inside of yourself as well. At times, overwhelming sadness and loneliness may be your constant companions. You may feel that when this person died, part of you died with him or her. And now you are faced with finding some meaning in going on with your life even though you may often feel so empty. This death also calls for you to confront your own spirituality. You may doubt your faith and have spiritual conflicts and questions racing through your head and heart. This is normal and part of your journey toward renewed living.

Need 6. Receiving ongoing support from others. The quality and quantity of understanding support you get during your grief journey will have a major influence on your capacity to heal. You cannot - nor should you try to - do this alone. Drawing on the experiences and encouragement of friends, fellow mourners or professional counselors is not a weakness but a healthy human need. And because mourning is a process that takes place over time, this support must be available months and even years after the death of someone in your life. Unfortunately, because our society places so much value on the ability to "carry on," "keep your chin up" and "keep busy," many mourners are abandoned shortly after the event of the death. "It's over and done with" and "It's time to get on with your life" are the types of messages directed at mourners that still dominate. Obviously, these messages encourage you to deny or repress your grief rather than express it. To be truly helpful, the people in your support system must appreciate the impact this death has had on you. They must understand that in order to heal, you must be allowed - even encouraged - to mourn long after the death. And they must encourage you to see mourning not as an enemy to be vanquished but as a necessity to be experienced as a result of having loved.

Reconciling your grief You may have heard - indeed you may believe - that your grief journey's end will come when you resolve, or recover from, your grief. But your journey will never end. People do not "get over" grief. Reconciliation is a term I find more appropriate for what occurs as the mourner works to integrate the new reality of moving forward in life without the physical presence of the person who died. With reconciliation comes a renewed sense of energy and confidence, an ability to fully acknowledge the reality of the death and a capacity to become reinvolved in the activities of living. In reconciliation, the sharp, ever-present pain of grief gives rise to a renewed sense of meaning and purpose. Your feeling of loss will not completely disappear, yet they will soften, and the intense pangs of grief will become less frequent. Hope for a continued life will emerge as you are able to make commitments to the future, realizing that the person who died will never be forgotten, yet knowing that your life can and will move forward.

Related Resources The Journey Through Grief: Reflections on Healing (book) Copyright 2007-2013, Center for Loss and Life Transition

• Death & Grief

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The After Journey: A survivor’s guide after the death of a loved one by suicide Paperback – July 29, 2023

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The After Journey is a short guide for all those who lost a loved one to suicide along with a chapter for those who are supporting survivors. Written by Jenny and Harry Bruell seven years after losing their daughter to suicide, the After Journey provides a mix of personal stories with a compassionate and objective look at nine aspects of the After Journey.

• Print length 89 pages
• Language English
• Publication date July 29, 2023
• Dimensions 6 x 0.21 x 9 inches
• ISBN-13 979-8399714899
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Product details

• ASIN ‏ : ‎ B0CCZWJHJN
• Publisher ‏ : ‎ Independently published (July 29, 2023)
• Language ‏ : ‎ English
• Paperback ‏ : ‎ 89 pages
• ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 979-8399714899
• Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 4.6 ounces
• Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 6 x 0.21 x 9 inches
• #776 in Coping with Suicide Grief
• #2,424 in Grief & Bereavement
• #33,628 in Parenting & Relationships (Books)

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41 Life After Death Quotes to Inspire & Enlighten

Sally is a prolific non-fiction and fiction writer, who has appeared in multiple print and digital publications.

Learn about our Editorial Policy .

Life after death quotes offer hope of what awaits you beyond. A quote about life after death may ease your fears and prepare you for a new journey.

Life After Death Quotes for Everyone

You may find life after death quotes inspiring and enlightening. When facing death, it is comforting to know your soul will continue in a new plane of existence.

• Life after death is real.
• After death, you travel to another world where loved ones greet you.
• The soul is eternal and lives on after physical death.
• Life after death means you can become whatever you wish in a new life.
• After death, you travel through a tunnel of light to another world.
• Life after death is spent in a vibrant and colorful world.
• After death, you understand the things you thought were important, actually weren't.
• Life after death is full of light and love.
• When you die, you travel to the stars and beyond.
• After death, you rest and then decide where you wish to go next.
• 3 Church Christmas Speeches to Share the Good News

Perfect Quote Life After Death

A quote about life after death can make you contemplate the hereafter. You may view life after death with a different perspective once you consider a few quotes.

• Life after death is a bigger adventure than life on Earth.
• After death, I want to sit on a cloud for a while and just watch to world go by.
• Life after death is unknown and mysterious.
• Where you go after death is determined by where you went in life.
• Death is not the end, your soul continues.
• There is life after death, and everyone eventually discovers this truth.
• After I die, I want to travel to the moon and just sit there looking at the Earth spin.
• It is true that there is life after death.
• After death, your soul rejoins loved ones who died before you.
• Life after death means you continue to exist.

Finding Inspiration With Life After Death Quotations

Life after death quotations are ways you can view life that are inspiring and offer possible enlightenment. You may discover a quote about life after death that offers hope and comfort.

• I want to spend my life after death just chillin' on a beach basking under the sun.
• When I die, I plan to be that spirit who mediums contact, so I can mess with them.
• Life after death is more colorful and dimensional than life on Earth.
• Life after death is not what everyone thinks; it's better!
• A new adventure begins your life after death.
• Life after death is like stepping through a door into another world.
• Life after death has many worlds for you to explore.
• There is a joyful life after death for those who spent a joyful life.
• When you die, loved ones greet you in the next life.
• When you die, you review your life and judge your actions.

What Happens After Death Quote?

Many people of faith believe they go to heaven after death. Other religions believe in reincarnation and that after death, you return to another life on Earth.

• After death, you fly to heaven to be with God, the father.
• When you die, you get to see the face of God.
• After death, you go back home to heaven.
• When you die, you're escorted home by angels.
• Life after death is the beginning of your next life.
• After death, you must decide to be reborn or continue on your journey.
• Your life after death is determined by the karma you created in life.
• When you die, you prepare to be reincarnated into a new life.
• Many religions talk about a beautiful life waiting beyond this life.
• For Christians , through Christ, there is life eternal after death.
• After you die, you can do anything and go anywhere.

Discovering and Using Life After Death Quotes

You can browse life after death quotes for inspiration. A few life after death quotes are a great way to encourage your journey toward enlightenment.

Home » Endings Explained

A Journey’s Ending Is A Heart-Wrenching Reminder Of Life’s Unfairness

WARNING: THIS ARTICLE CONTAINS MAJOR SPOILERS

The ending of  A Journey is unexpectedly devastating and speaks about the true frailty of human life.

It always seemed clear that the Netflix film would build to a tear-jerking conclusion, but I was nonetheless taken aback by its poignancy. There’s a desperate feeling to the whole endeavor of Bryan and Kristoff trying to convince Shane to reconsider treatment for her cancer during their trip to Tasmania, but the late reversal is a real saddening shock.

Why Did Shane Refuse Treatment?

Having already lived through cancer once, Shane refuses treatment when she gets the devastating news that the terrible illness has returned. Instead, she makes up a “magic list” of things she wants to do. Kristoff, aka “Tupe”, decided to help by paying for himself, Shane, and her husband Bryan to travel to Tasmania and tick as many items off Shane’s bucket list as possible, including helping her reconnect with her estranged father, Mr. T.

Secretly, the men are hoping Shane will change her mind about the treatment after fulfilling everything on her list.

After their experience seeing the little penguins, Shane, Bryan, Kristoff, and Mr. T check into a nearby motel. Mr. T accidentally slips up and tells Shane that Bryan’s been asking about cancer specialists. Furious, Shane confronts her husband, who’s unapologetic about wanting her to live. Sadly, her cancer has metastasized to other organs and she’s unlikely to survive even with treatment. That’s why she didn’t want to get the chemo.

Shane’s decision, and then her further decision to subsequently hide her justification, speaks to that essential question of how we’d live the remainder of our lives if we knew the clock was ticking down to zero. Shane thinks living large temporarily is better than suffering indefinitely. It’s easy to see Bryan’s point of view, though; he wants his wife to survive. It’s hard for someone to accept the death of a loved one, even if they have already resigned themselves to it.

Shane and Bryan Renew Their Vows

A Journey | Image via Netflix

The following day, Mr. T. leads Shane to a nearby church, where Bryan and his best man, Tupe, are already waiting. Mr. T apologizes for not being around to walk her down the aisle at the first wedding but is grateful he can do it now. Through tears of joy, Bryan and Shane exchange rings and reassure each other of their love, even after they’ve fought. 

On the last day of their trip, the trio go to the beach. Shane thanks Bryan and Tupe for bringing her to Australia and making her happy. She then reveals that she’s decided to get treatment for the cancer and hopefully get to experience Australia the following year. It’s safe to say, Bryan and Tupe are overjoyed to hear this. 

Here, I believed  A Journey  was building towards a happy ending. I was wrong.

Bryan’s Unexpected Demise

Shane and Bryan spend their first night back home in great spirits. But in the morning, Bryan collapses unexpectedly. Shane calls an ambulance, and he’s rushed to the hospital, but the doctors can’t do anything to save him. A devastated Shane has to listen to the doctor telling Tupe her beloved husband died from an aneurysm. 

At Bryan’s funeral, Shane notes how all the arrangements were the ones she had planned for herself and how she never expected to lose Bryan. Shane and Tupe go back to her home and she’s holding Bryan’s ashes in the same urn she’d picked out after first receiving her diagnosis. 

From beyond the grave, Bryan had one last surprise for Shane. He arranged for her favorite singer, Ogie, to come and give her a private performance. 

The way  A Journey  plays with expectations here is devastating. The idea of all the preparations Shane made for her death having to suddenly be applied to her husband’s has a real poignancy, especially given that Shane had already reversed her own decision to accept death.

Tupe Is Left Alone

Tupe decided to take Bryan’s advice, so he told his agent he’d like to get out of his comfort zone. He pitches the idea of a movie about Bryan and Shane’s love story. 

Shane still keeps her promise to her husband and proceeds with the cancer treatments. Tupe and her mother stay by her side through the ordeal. Unfortunately, Shane isn’t responding well to the chemo. When Tupe visits to share his recent Film Festival win with her, Shane confesses that she misses her husband too much to fight the cancer off. 

A while after Shane’s passing, Tupe visits the viewpoint in Tasmania alone and leaves the two penguin toys, Bryan’s necklace, and the film festival award he got for the movie about them. 

The film ends with Tupe inviting a woman who recognized him from the movie he made about Bryan and Shane’s love story out for a coffee. 

You can also check out my thoughts on the film overall in my review of A Journey . You can also read more about Penguin, Tasmania , where the movie was filmed.

Article by Lori Meek

Lori Meek has been a Ready Steady Cut contributing writer since September 2022 and has had over 400 published articles since. She studied Film and Television at Southampton Solent University, where she gained most of her knowledge and passion for the entertainment industry. Lori’s work is also featured on platforms such as TBreak Media and ShowFaves.

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• Grief Quotes

26 Famous Quotes About the End of a Journey

Updated 08/28/2023

Published 10/11/2022

Belinda McLeod, BA in Secondary Education

Contributing writer

Cake values integrity and transparency. We follow a strict editorial process to provide you with the best content possible. We also may earn commission from purchases made through affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases. Learn more in our affiliate disclosure .

Sometimes you know that your life is about to change, but other times an unexpected event causes you to change course. You may be searching for the perfect end-of-a-journey quote as you contemplate your change. Here are some to consider. 

Jump ahead to these sections:

End of a journey quotes for graduation, end of a journey quotes for retirement, end of a journey quotes for a trip or adventure, end of a journey quotes for a funeral or memorial service.

We have found quotes for graduating, retiring, or going on a journey. And if you consider death an end-of-journey event, we also have selections.

Graduation is undoubtedly a significant life event. So here are some post-worthy quotes to use as you (or your friend or family member) enter the next phase of life.

1. “The heights by great men reached and kept/ Were not attained by sudden flight,/ But they, while their companions slept,/ Were toiling upward in the night.” – Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Share this quote with someone who persevered through a tough educational challenge. 

2. “It has always seemed strange to me that in our endless discussions about education so little stress is laid on the pleasure of becoming an educated person, the enormous interest it adds to life. To be able to be caught up into the world of thought – that is to be educated.” – Edith Hamilton

Perhaps the graduate may not feel the “pleasure of becoming an educated person” so soon after graduation. 

3. “You are educated. Your certification is in your degree. You may think of it as the ticket to the good life. Let me ask you to think of an alternative. Think of it as your ticket to change the world.” – Tom Brokaw

Sometimes the best part about ending a phase of life is looking forward to the next one.

4. “Instruction ends in the schoolroom, but education ends only with life.” – Frederick W. Robertson

Sometimes the most important lessons are learned outside the classroom.

Some count the days until retirement, and others look at it with trepidation. Here are quotes that describe both types of outlooks.

5. “At every point in the human journey we find that we have to let go in order to move forward; and letting go means dying a little. In the process we are being created anew, awakened afresh to the source of our being.” – Kathleen R. Fischer

Surprisingly, you may find it hard to let go of your job. So here are some words of encouragement for those who face retirement with trepidation.

6. “Getting something done is an accomplishment; getting something done right is an achievement.” – Unknown

Are you celebrating someone who contributed significantly to your organization? Here’s a quote for someone who always went above and beyond.

7. “What lies behind us and what lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

As you reflect on your career and look forward to your future endeavors, remember that WHO you are is just as important as what you have accomplished (or will accomplish.)

There are a lot of quotes about embarking on a trip or adventure. However, few can describe the bittersweet end of a journey. So, here are some end-of-a-journey quotes that may help explain how you feel.

8. “Each difficult moment has the potential to open my eyes and open my heart.” – Myla Kabat-Zinn

Sometimes trips are difficult and painful. This quote describes how to look on the bright side of such experiences.

9. “Not all those who wander are lost.” – J.R.R. Tolkien

You've likely seen this quote on Instagram posts or used by travel bloggers. Yes, this quote is overused. However, it may perfectly describe your love of adventure.

10. “I am not the same, having seen the moon shine on the other side of the world.” – Mary Anne Radmacher

We love this quote! International travel – especially to countries significantly different from yours – can irrevocably change you.

11. “Travel isn’t always pretty. It isn’t always comfortable. Sometimes it hurts, it even breaks your heart. But that’s okay. The journey changes you; it should change you. It leaves marks on your memory, on your consciousness, on your heart, and on your body. You take something with you. Hopefully, you leave something good behind.” – Anthony Bourdain

We have all had that painful travel experience. Hopefully, yours changed you for the better.

12. “Two roads diverged in a wood, and I – I took the one less traveled by” — Robert Frost

This quote is from Robert Frost’s famous poem “The Road Not Traveled.” It’s often used at graduations but could work for any journey.

13. “A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for.” – John A. Shedd

Please accept our condolences if you recently lost a loved one. You may be looking for quotes about death for the funeral slideshow or service, so here are some to consider. 

Turn to Cake’s blog for additional help. These quotes might tell you if your loved one traveled a difficult road. And, of course, you might need help writing the eulogy for the service. 

14. “It is the will of God and Nature that these mortal bodies be laid aside, when the soul is to enter into real life; ’tis rather an embryo state, a preparation for living; a man is not completely born until he be dead: Why then should we grieve that a new child is born among the immortals?” – Benjamin Franklin

This quote is perfect for someone who needs reassurance that their loved one is enjoying the afterlife. 

15. “There are things that we don’t want to happen but have to accept, things we don’t want to know but have to learn, and people we can’t live without but have to let go.” – Unknown

Some end-of-journey quotes focus on the deceased, while this encourages those left behind. 

16. “For death is no more than a turning of us over from time to eternity.” – William Penn

Here’s another quote about continuing life’s journey after death.

17. “When he shall die/ Take him and cut him out in little stars/ And he will make the face of heav’n so fine/ That all the world will be in love with night/ And pay no worship to the garish sun.” – William Shakespeare

These lines from Romeo and Juliet give a romantic view of death. Juliet speaks these words about her star-crossed lover.

18. “I can assure you that those who have already passed have not only made it to the Other Side, but are in a state of bliss.” – Sylvia Browne

Sylvia Browne wrote these reassuring words in the Journal of Love & Healing. 

19. “There is a land of the living and a land of the dead and the bridge is love, the only survival, the only meaning.” – Thornton Wilder

Thornton Wilder was an American playwright, most famous for his work “Our Town.”

20. “Death is nothing at all,/ I have only slipped into the next room/ I am I and you are you/ whatever we were to each other, that we are still.” – Henry Scott Holland

These beautiful lines open Henry Scott Holland’s poem “All Is Well.” You may consider using this piece during your loved one’s service or funeral slideshow.

21. “Your body is away from me/ but there is a window open/ from my heart to yours./ From this window, like the moon/ I keep sending news secretly.” – Rumi

Can poems be considered quotes? We think so. This short piece is “The Window” by Rumi. Readers will be comforted by the idea that their loved one is on the ultimate journey.

22. “The journey doesn’t end here. Death is just another path, one that we all must take” – J.R.R. Tolkien

This is the second quote by Tolkien on our list. 

23. “For life and death are one, even as the river and the sea are one” – Khalil Gibran

Khalil Gibran is the author of “The Prophet.”

24. “Only a moment you stayed, but what an imprint your footprints have left on our hearts” – Dorothy Ferguson

Are you saying goodbye to someone who wasn’t long on this Earth? Here is a quote to describe how you feel about your loved one’s passing.

25. “Perhaps passing through the gates of death is like passing quietly through the gate in a pasture fence. On the other side, you keep walking, without the need to look back. No shock, no drama, just the lifting of a plank or two in a simple wooden gate in a clearing. Neither pain, nor floods of light, nor great voices, but just the silent crossing of a meadow” – Mark Helprin

This quote could also offer great comfort to someone suffering a loss.

26. “Goodbyes are only for those who love with their eyes. Because for those who love with heart and soul there is no such thing as separation” – Rumi

This quote could be used for many different purposes – for someone retiring, moving, – or for someone who passed.

The End? Or a New Beginning?

We hope these quotes offer comfort and peace to those of you who are facing a significant transition. You may also look for poems or songs about journeys and change. Even if these words are no comfort, you may feel some solace knowing that others have faced similar difficulties. 

Categories:

• Grief Quotes, Prayers & More
• Quotes About Death
• Funeral & Memorial Poems
• Grief Poems
• Poems About Death

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How to Find Closure After a Tragic Loss: Navigating the Healing Journey

by illume Editorial Team | Jul 28, 2023

Understanding the Stages of Grief

The grieving process is not linear, and it’s crucial to remember that there is no “right” way to grieve. However, understanding the common stages of grief can help you navigate your emotions. The stages of grief may include denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. It’s normal to experience these emotions in varying intensities and not necessarily in any particular order. Give yourself the space to process these feelings as they arise.

Embracing the Healing Journey

Finding closure after the death of a loved one is a healing journey unique to each individual. Allow yourself the time and space to grieve without judgement or haste. Healing is not about forgetting your loved one; it’s about accepting that they are no longer physically present and finding a way to honour their memory while continuing your life in a meaningful way.

The Importance of Allowing Yourself to Mourn

Grief can be overwhelming, and you might find yourself trying to suppress your emotions to appear strong. However, allowing yourself to mourn is a necessary part of the healing process. Embrace your feelings and seek support from friends, family, or a support group. Talking about your loved one and sharing memories can be therapeutic and help you find comfort during this challenging time.

Seeking Counselling or Therapy

Sometimes, the weight of grief can become too much to bear alone. Seeking counselling or therapy can provide a safe space to express your emotions without judgement. A professional counsellor can guide you through the healing process, offer coping strategies, and provide valuable support as you search for closure and peace.

Accepting the Reality of Loss

One of the hardest parts of finding closure after the death of a loved one is accepting the reality of the loss. It’s natural to hold onto hope that they will return or that the situation is a terrible dream. However, acceptance is a crucial step towards healing. It doesn’t mean you have to forget your loved one; it means acknowledging that they are no longer with you physically.

Honouring Your Loved One’s Memory

Finding closure doesn’t mean closing the door on the memories you shared with your loved one. Instead, it’s about cherishing those memories and finding ways to honor their life. Create a memorial, start a charitable initiative in their name, or celebrate their birthday with their favourite activities. Doing so can help you feel connected to them and keep their spirit alive.

Finding Meaning in the Pain

As you navigate your grief journey, remember that pain and suffering can lead to personal growth and profound insights. While it might not seem apparent now, your grief can open your heart to empathy and understanding, allowing you to offer support to others who are experiencing loss.

Embracing the Healing Process

The healing process takes time, so be patient with yourself. There’s no deadline for finding closure or “getting over” your loss. Healing is about learning to live with the absence of your loved one while finding joy in life once again.

Finding closure after the death of a loved one is a deeply personal and challenging process. Remember that you are not alone in this journey; countless others have experienced similar pain and found their way to healing. Embrace the stages of grief, seek support, and allow yourself the time to mourn. While the pain of losing someone we love never completely fades, finding closure can help us move forward with a newfound sense of peace and acceptance.

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What Happens After Death? Understanding Where Your Soul Goes

The present state is where you are now. You exist in this present state. From the moment of conception, you became a human being, that is, a “soul.” Your soul is eternal. Scripture teaches us that we exist from conception until death, from death until the Second Coming of Jesus Christ and the General Resurrection from the dead, and then, the New Heavens and the New Earth. This article will seek to answer what happens at death to both your body and soul. 

What Happens After Death?

It is important to admit that the word “soul” is not merely a disembodied entity. In the Bible, “soul” is who you are. Consider Genesis:

God “breathed the breath of life” into Adam, and he became a “living soul” ( Genesis 2:7 ; the New Revised Standard uses the word, “being”). Thus, in the biblical view, Adam does not have a soul; Adam is a soul (i.e., a person, a living being). The soul is, literally, “. . . that which breathes, the breathing substance or being. [1] In his article “Soul,” G.W. Moon says “In Christian theology the soul carries the further connotation of being that part of the individual that partakes of divinity and survives the death of the body.”

Augustine and Thomas Aquinas rejected Platonic dualism, which saw the soul as good and the body as corrupt. These two theological giants, separated by centuries, agreed the Bible teaches that the spirit is the eternal person, but will one day have an eternal body:

“According to Saint Thomas Aquinas, who follows Aristotle in his definition of the human soul, the soul is an individual spiritual substance, the ‘form’ of the body. Both, body and soul together, constitute the human unity, though the soul may be severed from the body and lead a separate existence, as happens after death. The separation, however, is not final, as the soul, in this differing from the angels, was made for the body. [2]

The Psalmist spoke of our soul as the very inmost being of our person: “Praise the Lord, my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name” ( Psalm 103:1 NIV).

Jesus spoke of the inestimable value of the human soul (and simultaneously taught that soul and body will be reunited for either eternal life with or, in that case, without God):

“Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell” ( Matthew 10:28 NIV).

Your body and soul, like all of Creation, are marred by the Fall and its consequences. Or, as John Milton titled the situation in his epic poem, Paradise Lost.  The fallen soul must be redeemed. This is the plan of God, the Covenant of Grace, that constitutes the single scarlet thread that binds the entire Bible together.

Therefore, we must admit:

Your Body and Soul Need Redeeming From the Fall

David wrote in Psalm 19 about the wonder of God’s world, His creation. But in verse seven David makes a turn. The “general revelation” gives evidence of Almighty God, but “special revelation,” God’s Word, is necessary to do this one thing: “revive” the human soul. Psalm 19:17 says “The law of the Lord is perfect, converting the soul” ( KJV ).

Indeed, we are to be born again, the soul undergoing a supernatural transition, making it “fit” for heaven. Our souls are “lost” without redemption.

The Bible teaches that there is no other redemption available except that “way” that Almighty God has provided through His only begotten Son, Jesus Christ: “And there is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved” ( Acts 4:12 ESV).

Jesus Christ is the Redeemer According to the Covenant of Grace

When the Gospel is proclaimed and received by faith, the terms of the Covenant are imputed to you (the terms are expressed in “a great exchange:” the repentant and believing sinner receives Christ’s righteousness and His atoning sacrifice on the Cross; Christ received the sinner’s sin and punishment for sin). You pass from death and judgment to forgiveness and eternal life. “Truly, truly, I say to you, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life. He does not come into judgment but has passed from death to life” ( John 5:24 ESV).Not so the unrepentant. The soul remains in a fallen state, responsible for the terms of the Covenant of Works (the soul that sins must die). It is for this reason that the Psalmist, speaking in the voice of the Messiah to come, declares that God will not leave his soul to perish. This truth is also picked up by Peter in his first sermon at Pentecost. The soul without God will undergo unimaginable loss that is described by Jesus with the most severe imagery (e.g., Matthew 25:46 : “And these will go away into eternal punishment, but the righteous into eternal life.”).

My dear reader: your soul and mine must be redeemed from the auction block of sin and the devil lest we — that is, our souls — face certain loss and punishment. And the only Redeemer of God’s elect is the Lord Jesus Christ. Repent. Trust in the resurrected and living Christ while you are still reading this article. Stop what you are doing and turn to Jesus Christ by faith.

Our study leads us, then, to the place of the soul between death and the Second Coming of Jesus Christ.

When we say, “the intermediate state ,” we are not speaking of “limbo” or “purgatory” or any such thing. We are speaking of that period in which the soul is in heaven and our remains await resurrection. That is the “intermediate state” in our personal eschatology.

Where Do Bodies Go After Death?

The redeemed are ushered into the eternal presence of the Lord, and those without an advocate (righteousness to meet God’s Law and sacrifice to atone for sin) are ushered into hell to await the New Heaven and New Earth.

The Bible teaches that the human spirit, upon departing the body, goes immediately into the presence of God for either His welcoming or His disapproval. Thus, our blessed Savior taught this truth when He gave the parable of the wicked in Hell crying out to Abraham for refreshment:

“There was a rich man who was clothed in purple and fine linen and who feasted sumptuously every day. And at his gate was laid a poor man named Lazarus , covered with sores, who desired to be fed with what fell from the rich man’s table. Moreover, even the dogs came and licked his sores. The poor man died and was carried by the angels to Abraham’s side. The rich man also died and was buried, and in Hades, being in torment, he lifted up his eyes and saw Abraham far off and Lazarus at his side. And he called out, ‘Father Abraham, have mercy on me, and send Lazarus to dip the end of his finger in water and cool my tongue, for I am in anguish in this flame.’ But Abraham said, ‘Child, remember that you in your lifetime received your good things, and Lazarus in like manner bad things; but now he is comforted here, and you are in anguish ( Luke 16:19-25 ESV).

There is no more concise and thoroughly Biblical expression of faith about the soul going immediately to be with God until the resurrection than the 38 th question in the Westminster Shorter Catechism:

Q. 38. What benefits do believers receive from Christ at the resurrection? A. At the resurrection, believers being raised up in glory ( 1 Cor. 15:42-43 ), shall be openly acknowledged and acquitted in the day of judgment ( Matt 25:33-34 ), and made perfectly blessed in the full enjoying of God ( Rom. 8:29 , 1 John 3:2 ) to all eternity ( Ps. 16:11 , 1 John 3:2 ).

At death, the body returns to the elements: “dust to dust . . .” But the soul resurrects with a new heavenly body. 

At the Second Coming of Jesus Christ, the General Resurrection commences. The redeemed bodies are renewed with the eternal soul and rise to meet Jesus Christ, joining Him in the air, taking their place with the glorious company of angels, archangels, prophets, apostles, martyrs and the whole company of heaven. The Great White Throne Judgement has been the subject of classical Christian teaching throughout Church history: “And I saw a great white throne, and him that sat on it, from whose face the earth and the heaven fled away; and there was found no place for them” ( Revelation 20:11 ).

The unregenerate bodies are also resurrected. United with soul, each appears before the Great Final Judgment. Without the Advocate, our Lord Jesus Christ, these suffer the righteous sentence of God for unbelief. The redeemed also appear before the Lord. But Jesus Christ is their Advocate. His perfect life is accounted to theirs to meet the Divine requirement of perfect obedience (Christ fulfills the Covenant of Works). The Lord Jesus’ atoning death on Calvary’s Cross provides the blood sacrifice of the only Son of God applied to their lives. The punishment of their sins has been placed upon the Second Person of the One true and holy God.

The redeemed are fully acquitted, by God in Christ, their Savior. The unredeemed are cast into eternal hell with the devil and his angels (demons). Walter A. Elwell and Barry J. Beitzel summarized it in their article “Eschatology” with brilliant concision and brevity:

“All who have died will come to life. This will be a bodily resurrection, a resumption of bodily existence of each person. For believers this will take place in connection with the second coming of Christ and will involve the transformation of the body of this present flesh into a new, perfected body ( 1 Cor 15:35-56 ). The Bible also indicates a resurrection of unbelievers, unto eternal death ( Jn 5:28 , 29).

The great Dutch commentator, William Hendriksen, wrote with unsurpassed theological and Scriptural fidelity as he described this event in his book “ More Than Conquerors: An Interpretation of the Book of Revelation ”:

“Christ’s coming in judgment is vividly described. John sees a great white throne. Upon it is seated the Christ ( Matt. 25:31 ; Rev. 14:14 ). From His face the earth and the heaven flee away. Not the destruction or annihilation but the renovation of the universe is indicated here. It will be a dissolution of the elements with great heat ( 2 Pet. 3:10 ); a regeneration (Mt. 19:28); a restoration of all things ( Acts 3:21 ); and a deliverance from the bondage of corruption ( Rom. 8:21 ). No longer will this universe be subject to ‘vanity’. John sees the dead, the great and the small, standing before the throne. All individuals who have ever lived on earth are seen before the throne. The books are opened and the records of the life of every person consulted (Dn. 7:10). Also, the book of life, containing the names of all believers is opened ( Rev. 3:5 ; 13:8). The dead are judged in accordance with their works (Mt. 25:31 ff.; Rom. 14:10 ; 2 Cor. 5:10 ). The sea gives up its dead; so do Death and Hades. Here is the one, general resurrection of all the dead. The entire Bible teaches but one, general resurrection (read Jn. 5:28 f.). This one and only and general resurrection takes place at the last day ( Jn. 6:39 f., 44, 54).”

Even After Death - The New Heaven and the New Earth

The universe, earth, and all things are both burned and then renewed as the New Heavens and the New Earth is unveiled. While the souls (and bodies reunited) of the unrepentant are cast into eternal hell, believers are welcomed into the New Heaven and New Earth. One of the most remarkable passages among so many equally astounding passages is found in St. Paul’s first epistle to the Church at Corinth. In Chapter 15, the inspired Apostle makes the resurrection the centering point for “eternity past” and “eternity future.” Paul seeks to give words to what he sees at the farthest reaches of the future state: “When all things are subjected to him, then the Son himself will also be subjected to him who put all things in subjection under him, that God may be all in all” ( 1 Corinthians 15:28 ).

Thus, the human soul. From the breath of life at conception to the inscrutable event in ages to come when, body and soul, we witness the climactic fulfillment of the ancient Covenant, this is the soul of a believer. The soul without Christ is in peril. The soul of any who calls upon the name of the Lord to be saved will be gloriously transformed.

Answering “What happens to my soul when I die?”

As a pastor and a teaching theologian, this is one of the most frequent questions I receive. However, the inquiry most often comes to me, not in the form of an abstract question, but in the context of crisis. Indeed, this is how the question was posed by Mrs. Henley: in a defining moment of her faith on trial.

I was a young pastor. I was on assignment as a pastoral care intern for a congregation not my own. I was a pastor “on loan,” one might say. My mission? I was dispatched by the church leadership to provide pastoral ministry to a family I didn’t know. I was told that the Henley family was gathered at a nearby nursing home and that they had requested a pastoral presence. The elder who telephoned me gave instructions that I would find Mr. Henley, a long-time member, in room 201. Mrs. Gladys Henley, his wife of sixty-some-odd years would be there to greet me. Mr. Henley’s forty-something-year-old son and his wife would also be there. They had flown in from the West Coast to be with the matriarch and patriarch in this difficult time.

I rehearsed the coming pastoral visit in my mind as I pulled into the covered parking garage. I guided my trusty old Buick sedan into that most appreciated of privileges — clergy parking. I put her in park. I killed the engine. I drew in a breath of hope as I exhaled a prayer for help: “Lord, guide me.”

Before departing for the brief stroll to the nursing home, I opened my Bible. I needed a passage that would serve as my “pastoral prescription” for the spiritual cure to the anticipated spiritual condition of this family. I keep a list of familiar Bible chapters and verses for hospital visits. The passages are arranged, in smeared fountain ink from my own hand, according to spiritual cure of common conditions — aging, bereavement, conflict, and so forth. I came to “vigil.” The family vigil is the gathering of family members (and close friends) in anticipation of a loved one’s passing. My eyes found the words of Luke’s Acts of the Apostles and Saint Peter’s quotation of 

Psalm 16:10 , “For you will not abandon my soul to Hades or let your Holy One see corruption. You have made known to me the paths of life; you will make me full of gladness with your presence” ( Acts 2:27 , 28 ESV).

The family greeted me at the lobby of this elegant elderly care facility. Formal introductions in hushed tones formed the introduction to the family. The Henley son, Robert, Jr., asked me to follow them to Mr. Henley’s room. Mr. Robert Henley, Sr., Esq., was nearly 100 years old. The wise old jurist was a long-time follower of Jesus Christ. Others recognized his gift of gentle leadership and patient wisdom. He was a well-beloved elder, a lay officer, in his home church. Robert Henley had been a prominent attorney in the community where I served. The phrase “city father” comes to mind. Mr. Henley was known as a godly, devoted family man, who also gave much of his life, and not a small amount of his fortune, to the service and needs of his neighbors.

He never had political aspirations. However, if you were a politician and wanted to increase your chances of election, you likely would pay a visit to Robert Henley before you even filed as a candidate. I guess one could say that Mr. Henley had gravitas. He was a big man, a great man, and a faithful man. His immediate family—Mrs. Henley and her adult son, Robert, Jr., and his wife, Katherine—were gathered in a family vigil. For, by then, Mr. Henley was a dying man.

It would be a familiar scene in my ministry for years to come. A grieving family gathered around a weakened figure. Prayers, hymns, silence, and memories converge to form a needed blanket of peace for the one about to depart if not more so for those remaining. Being with a family at such a tender time remains one of the greatest honors of my life. Ask any pastor. He will tell you the same.

I had been in Mr. Henley’s room at the nursing home — for all intents and purposes, it was a hospital room — for more than two hours. The family had been there much longer. I was thinking about the man before me, the man I didn’t know, but the man I was called to prepare for a journey home. My contemplations were pleasantly interrupted when a cheerful nurse came in to check for vital signs of her patient. As she finished her monitoring, she looked at Mrs. Henley and smiled. The kind woman leaned over and put her arm around Mrs. Henley and spoke softly: “Hon, why don’t you go to our café and get you some coffee and a sandwich? They have got some good sandwiches! And you sure need a break.” I certainly agreed. Poor Mrs. Henley looked so tired. The nurse encouraged Mrs. Henley with another whisper, as she helped her up, “Come on, now, Mrs. Henley. There we go . . .”

Reluctantly, Mrs. Henley agreed and stood erect in the room. Her son, Robert, Jr., and Katherine, his wife, the younger Mrs. Henley — a demure but smartly-dressed young lady with a pretty and seemingly permanent smile — guided the weakening wife away. I listened to the echoes of their steps in the hall. I heard the elevator ring its arrival. Then a sacred stillness seemed to descend on the scene like someone’s mother casting a cotton sheet on a bed in slow motion. Still. Slow. Silent. Holy.

I was alone in the hospital room with Mr. Henley. The various medical mechanisms mimicked the beating of his heart, inhaling, and exhaling of his lungs. I listened to the rhythmic beep-beep of a monitor, and the oscillating hiss of oxygen. I had taken a seat when the family had walked out. Yet, at that moment, I felt led to stand. I also felt led to speak, “Mr. Henley, I am not sure if you can hear me, Sir. Mr. Henley, I have a Scripture for you from God’s Word. It is a very simple and powerful truth. I am certain that you know it.” 

The blips, beeps, and hisses were unimpressed by my announcement. The background noises continued as a kind of technological witness. “Mr. Henley, this is the Word of the Lord: ‘We are confident, I say, and willing rather to be absent from the body, and to be present with the Lord’ ( 2 Corinthians 5:8 KJV). Did you hear that Mr. Henley? Jesus will never leave you nor forsake you. And if He comes for you, your spirit — the real you! — will be with Jesus. The One you have loved throughout all of the days of your life will receive you.” He moved not. However, I was not deterred. I was convicted by early experience in my internship to read Scripture even if a patient was in a coma. I would follow for over three decades, occasionally with memorable results. This was one of them.  

I began to pray the Lord’s Prayer audibly: “Our Father . . .” Suddenly, and quite astonishingly, Mr. Henley’s lips began trying to move. I drew closer, still praying, “who art in heaven . . .” The old saint was seeking to pray with me. I continued. “Hallowed be Thy Name . . .” This dear man of God was giving the last measure of strength to do what he had done for nearly five thousand Sundays. He began to worship  God. It was as if the words to the Lord’s Prayer sparked an autonomic response of the soul. He opened his dry, cracking lips for just long enough to pray with me. He uttered the next phrase as if waiting to catch up with me. “Thy Kingdom come; Thy will be done . . .” As I continued, more confident in my own faith because of his, his voice went silent. The small motion of his lips ceased in mid-sentence. And as suddenly as he had begun, he stopped praying. Mr. Henley had stopped breathing. At just about “Thy Kingdom come . . .” Mr. Henley’s prayer was answered. Mr. Henley was in the presence of the Lord.

I stood without movement. I was transfixed by the sight. There was even a kind of beauty, though I was holding the hand of a dead man. I thought of the Psalmist’s words, “Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints” ( Psalm 116:15 KJV). My fixed gaze of wonder was interrupted by the necessary practicality of nurses, residents, and orderlies hastening to the scene. In witnessing this miracle of the migration of the human soul, I didn't even notice the alarms. The mechanical sentries had sounded their call. The compassionate health care professionals answered in a second. But as I watched them, the scene was less of an emergency and more of, well, more of a tender moment of confirming what all were anticipating.

Soon enough, the family returned. Robert Jr. and Katherine both put their arms around Mrs. Henley. It was a holy moment. Soft sobs replaced the electronic sounds of the medical machinery. I knew the power of the ministry of presence as Mrs. Henley moved from her son to look at me. This new widow needed the promises of God, the assurance of the love of God, and the hope of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. For this reason, I was there. I embraced her — perhaps, better put, she embraced me — and she wept, ever so softly. This elderly woman of God, smaller than I, nestled her gray head on my chest. I was being inaugurated into the ministry by Mrs. Henley.

And then it happened. Right after I spoke these words, it happened: “Mrs. Henley, the Bible says that your dear husband is in the presence of our Lord Jesus at this very second. He passed from this life into the loving arms of Jesus. I was with him as his soul departed this room. He is more alive than ever.”

She confirmed my words by nodding her head as I held her. But something happened that I will never forget. The still, quiet sobs were broken by a rather stern word from her son. “Mother, I am sorry, but that is not right. Daddy is not here. And Daddy is not anywhere else. He is, well, for all practical purposes, just asleep.” He spoke the words for his mother, but he aimed his arrows at me. I was stunned, not by the theological error as much as the inappropriateness and even callousness of his words. “Mother, come out here and let me talk to you.” Mrs. Henley followed obediently. Scolded as her husband had died, she had, in the opinion of her son, succumbed to “nonsense.” She followed obediently. What else could she do? I stood motionless as both the family departed, and the medical professionals began procedures for removal of the body.

It could not have been more than about three minutes when Mrs. Henley returned. By this time, her late husband’s remains had been removed from the room. I extended my hands to welcome Mrs. Henley back. She took my hands without ever moving her eyes from mine. I smiled as if, perhaps, a warm gesture could erase the recent unpleasant words. Mrs. Henley broke down in heaving tears. I could barely hear her words: “Oh Pastor, my son says that my husband’s soul is just asleep! He is not with the Lord! Oh Pastor, everything I have ever known, ever believed, must be wrong!” I held Mrs. Henley and felt the deep grief rising through her sobs. “He is gone, Pastor. But where? Where is my husband?

I shared that intimate story with you because I believe that it illustrates the deep emotions that are involved with the question, “What happens to the soul at the time of death?” The question is not an esoteric inquiry into the unknowable. God has revealed to us in his word what happens to the human soul at the moment of death. In order to understand the answer to this question according to the Scriptures, we would do well to employ a systematic theological study  of the Christian faith concerning the question of the soul. To do so, let us arrange the biblical material according to the Bible’s explanation about the soul and the soul’s destiny. We will see that there is a present state, an intermediate state, and a final state . Theologians call this a personal eschatology. Eschatology speaks about the last things. We often think of eschatology in more cosmic terms, for example, what happens to the heavens and the earth in the future. That is a cosmic eschatology. But a personal eschatology is concerned with what happens to you. So let us begin.

As I opened my Bible and asked his grieving widow to read the Scriptures, she wiped her eyes, sought to compose herself, and adjusted her 1960s-framed-spectacle before leaning in to read: “We are confident, I say, and willing rather to be absent from the body, and to be present with the Lord” ( 2 Corinthians 5:8 KJV). Mrs. Henley looked up again, her silver-haired, intelligent head raising, her eyes meeting mine. “Pastor, I read that according to the Bible my Robert — my husband, Mr. Henley — is with the Lord. As soon as his spirit left his body he went to be with Jesus. That is what I had always been taught. But my son . . . Oh, pastor, is this the truth?”

I put my right hand on her shoulder seeking to agree. “Yes, Mrs. Henley. I watched as the soul of your husband departed his body. According to the Word of the Lord, there is no doubt that he is in the presence of the Lord Jesus.” I gently placed my left hand to a shoulder, now looking at her intently, holding her shoulders, directing my gaze with the strongest possible position of attention: “My beloved Mrs. Henley,” I paused to prepare for an unequivocal declaration to this grieving woman: “Ma’am: According to the promises of our Lord Jesus Christ I say to you that in the name of God, you will  see your husband again.”  And she rested in the promises of God.

But have you? I say to anyone reading: God created you as a person: soul and body.  The soul lives forever in one of two places: with your Creator or without Him. The adjudication of your eternal life rests with the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords. And He welcomes any and all who will turn from all other persons and plans and turn unto Him. For Jesus our Lord says, “Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” Rest from the frantic search for answers. Trust in Christ Jesus the resurrected and living Lord of life. His Covenant of Grace — Christ’s righteousness accounted for what you lack, and Christ’s sacrifice applied for your sins — has secured your destiny. And you will never walk alone.

God’s promises are your destiny: when you die, your soul goes immediately to the Lord. Your earthly remains are precious to God. “If the farmer knows where the corn is in the barn, then our Father knows where His precious seed is in the earth.” And in Christ, God will raise those remains to eternal life. If you have received Jesus Christ as Lord, you will be acquitted of all sins by the righteousness and the sacrifice on the cross by your Savior. And safe in the arms of Jesus. Why not pray with me?

Lord, our Heavenly Father: I am in awe of Your mighty creative power demonstrated not only in the wonder of the stars above or in the microscopic invisible world, but, especially, in the coming of Your Son Jesus our Lord; and in Him, in His perfect life lived for me and His sacrificial death offered for me on the cross, I do repent — turn away from — my sin of unbelief, self-sufficiency, and trusting in anyone and thing other than Your Messiah, Jesus of Nazareth; I know that I am a soul and body, and I ask that You transform my soul according to Your promises and Your power; I ask that you forgive me and receive me as Your child; and I believe that when I depart from this life I will go immediately to You, O dear Lord; So, take me and use me for Your glory. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.

[1] Richard Whitaker, Francis Brown, et al., The Abridged Brown-Driver-Briggs Hebrew-English Lexicon of the Old Testament: From A Hebrew and English Lexicon of the Old Testament by Francis Brown, S.R. Driver and Charles Briggs, Based on the Lexicon of Wilhelm Gesenius (Boston; New York: Houghton, Mifflin and Company, 1906).

[2] F. L. Cross and Elizabeth A. Livingstone, eds., The Oxford Dictionary of the Christian Church (Oxford;  New York: Oxford University Press, 2005), 1531.

Photo credit: ©GettyImages/ipopba

The After Journey

A survivor’s guide after the death of a loved one by suicide.

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Free download available here.

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The After Journey is a short guide for all those who lost a loved one to suicide along with a chapter for those who are supporting survivors. Written by Jenny and Harry Bruell seven years after losing their daughter to suicide, the After Journey provides a mix of personal stories with a compassionate and objective look at nine aspects of the After Journey.

The print edition is sold at just the cost of printing. You can download a pdf for free below. Please share with others who could benefit.

Click here for a review from the New Hampshire Coalition for Suicide Prevention.

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Praise for The After Journey

"This book by the Bruells has impressed me more than any of the other 'how-to-grieve' books I've ever read. First, it's suicide specific; grieving the loss of someone who died by suicide presents issues that others may never need to deal with: stigma and shame, trauma, and more. Next, the authors offer sensible, practical information about those issues sharing what they’ve learned through experience. Their respectful approach is gentle and respectful. Finally, the book’s organized in a logical way, and it’s written clearly and without excessive details that sometimes bog down readers. This is also the perfect book to guide participants in a support group dealing with grief after suicide. The topics invite sharing, discussion, and help in choosing a path to resolution." Karyl Chastain Beal, Founder of Parents of Suicide and Friends & Family of Suicide

“This is a beautiful book! Thank you so much for your vulnerability and openness in writing it. The personal stories are profound, the shared stories are thoughtful, and the bits of humor are relieving.” S.B.

“I am impressed with how many of my questions after my son’s suicide that you answered.” I.W.

“I have read your book twice now. I intend on reading your book many times. I felt encouraged knowing that I am not alone. I was encouraged to know that I am not grieving “wrong”. This is my grief and how I own it belongs to me.” J.M.

Mandisa remembered. Fans, music industry, friends pay tribute to 47-year-old singer

Grammy-award winning musician and "American Idol" alum Mandisa was found dead at her Nashville home on Thursday.

The 47-year-old Christian singer dazzled audiences when she hit the stage of "American Idol" in 2005 and made it through to the final nine. From there she released her debut album, but dealt with pain from the loss of a beloved friend and having a personal crisis of faith. Her journey through heartache and depression to finding her faith again inspired many that were going through similar situations.

"Mandisa was a voice of encouragement and truth to people facing life’s challenges all around the world," was written on an Instagram post announcing Mandisa's death.

Since the news of her death, family, fans and friends in and out of the music industry, have paid tribute to the singer.

What happened to Mandisa?

On Friday, The Media Collective, Mandisa's rep, issued this statement confirming her death, but did not disclose how the songstress died.

"We can confirm that yesterday Mandisa was found in her home deceased. At this time we do not know the cause of death or any further details. We ask for your prayers for her family and close-knit circle of friends during this incredibly difficult time."

Mandisa's story and journey to 'Overcome' touched many

Mandisa crisis of faith was an inspiration not only for an album, but inspired others who were going though hardship. Fans shared their stories on the Instagram post announcing her death.

"I’m devastated 💔💔💔 Overcomer help me healed when I loss my daughter at 16. She gave hope even when she didn’t have any to give herself. Mandisa is truly one of God’s Devine. I hope she finally has the peace she struggled so long to find. We have truly really loss one of God’s truest and purest creatures… I love you now and forever on Mandisa. God speed on your journey to heaven….," wrote user keishacraftsmith.

Other's shared how her music and writing helped them through some of the toughest times in their lives. Actress Candace Cameron Bure shared broken heart emojis under the post, while Christian rap artist Wande offered condolences.

Fellow Christian musician and friend Colton Dixon, shared memories of being on the road with Mendisa and Toby Mac.

"Mandisa is the sweetest, kindest soul that  @anniedixon__  and I have met on the road. After hearing she went to be with the Jesus last night I was reflecting this morning on the times we had together," Dixon wrote.

Singer and songwriter Matthew West paid tribute to his longtime friend and collaborator with lyrics from their song "Only the World", stating that they "hit differently" now that Mandisa was gone.

"I am so incredibly saddened to hear about the loss of my friend Mandisa. I will always cherish the memories of times we spent together hosting award shows, going on tour, and most of all helping her tell her story in the songwriting room," West also wrote on X, formerly known as Twitter.

Good Morning America anchor Robin Roberts also paid tribute to the late singer.

"My heart is heavy hearing about Mandisa. Incredibly blessed that she was there my first day back on ⁦ @GMA ⁩ following my long medical leave. Her beautiful music & spirit lifted me and countless others," Roberts wrote on X.

Fellow musician Don Moen provided a statement to The Tennessean, saying Mandisa was not only a powerhouse of a talent, but that she also possessed a genuinely kind spirit.

"We ministered together several times, she sang background vocals on my album 'Thank You Lord' and joined me on several tours," the statement read. "On one particular tour, notes kept appearing in everyone's bunk on the bus or in their instrument cases. These were encouraging messages like: 'You are blessed and highly favored,' or 'You're such a blessing on this tour.' Only at the end of the tour did we discover it had been Mandisa. Whether behind the scenes or center stage, her presence always brought joy and hope.

Where was Mandisa from?

Mandisa was born in California, but her home was in Tennessee.

She graduated Fisk University in Nashville in 2000 and was a member of the famed Fisk University Jubilee singers. She called Tennessee home after her graduation, through her "American Idol" tenure, a Grammy win, multiple albums and until her death on Thursday.

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Coming full circle

Johannes Semigak has spent nearly all of his adult life in jail. After causing the death of his brother, the Inuk man has embarked on a journey of learning about intergenerational trauma, relocation and addiction. 

Johannes Semigak steps off the plane in shackles. The Labrador wind whips up clouds of snow around his feet.

He takes a drag of his cigarette as he steps into a wooden qamutik, bearing a painted RCMP logo, that pulls Semigak toward his moment of reckoning.

Semigak is home. Back to Hopedale, the Inuit community on Labrador's isolated north coast where the 35-year-old was born and raised. Where he took his brother’s life. Where he hopes to build back his own.

Semigak is heading to a sentencing circle, a community-focused form of justice tailored for Indigenous communities — the first in at least five years in the province.

The Inuk man will be surrounded by lawyers, community members, family, an elder and a judge.

It’s what Semigak requested when he pleaded guilty, and he sees it as part of a larger effort to improve not only his own future but those of the Indigenous men he lives with at the Labrador Correctional Centre.

From a life on the land to unknown territory

In the visiting room of the Labrador Correctional Centre, the walls are painted with scenes from Inuit and Innu culture.

Semigak turns over the smooth sides of his carvings in his hands as he reflects on his own history — one filled with intergenerational trauma, alcohol addiction, neglect and abuse.

His family is one of more than 50 that were forcibly relocated from Hebron, an Inuit community 300 kilometres north of Hopedale, in 1959. 

"Living in Hebron, the way my dad talked about it, it was peaceful up [there]. Everybody helped out everybody. And there was no drinking, there were no drugs, and everybody lived off the land," Semigak said during a recent interview from the Labrador Correctional Centre.

"They [were] happy up there."

In 1959, the Moravian church and provincial government closed the town without consultations with local Inuit. Families were separated and placed in communities along the coast.

They were promised new homes but were forced instead to live in tents.

Semigak's mother's family were placed in Nain, his father in Hopedale, where the couple later met.

Semigak said his father's family coped by turning to alcohol, which flowed freely from the nearby American military base.

His parents developed a severe addiction to alcohol, which Semigak said led to him and his seven siblings often going hungry. That hunger turned into trouble with the justice system at age 11, when he and his late brother broke into the local school to steal cheese and crackers.

The theft resulted in Semigak being removed from Hopedale and taken to a group home in Nain, another Inuit community.

While in the care of provincial government’s child services, two of his siblings died by suicide. 

Despite his upbringing, Semigak does not put any blame at the feet of his parents.

"I don't blame my dad for being an alcoholic," Semigak said.

"I can see why. My dad and my grandparents were alcoholics because they didn't want to move from their homeland.… He went through horrible stuff."

Shortly after he turned 18, Semigak left the group home with a crippling addiction to alcohol, beginning a 17-year journey through the revolving door at the Labrador Correctional Centre in Happy Valley-Goose Bay.

Over that time, he compiled a lengthy criminal record, with convictions for offences as serious as assault and forcible confinement.

Drinking is what his family did, his grandparents and parents, said Semigak — and that was passed down to him. 

The death of a brother

Everything came to a head on Nov. 19, 2020, when Semigak and his older brother Thomas Tuglavina, 37, were drinking with friends.

"Still to this day, I don't know what happened. I don't know how it happened,” Semigak said in his jailhouse interview with CBC News.

Semigak said his brother was like a best friend and the two spent a lot of time together.

Both struggled with addiction and intergenerational trauma.

"We was always drinking together. We was always smoking weed together," Semigak said. "He always looked out for me."

An agreed statement of facts submitted to the court fills in the gaps.

According to a witness, the two brothers got into a fight inside the family’s home on Berry Road that ended when a neighbour intervened, pulling Semigak off Tuglavina.

Semigak walked away. Tuglavina went to a neighbour’s house to call the police but declined medical attention.

Later that day, Tuglavina's condition deteriorated and he was taken to the local clinic with stomach pains.

He died around 4:20 p.m., while waiting for a medevac out of the community.

Court documents say he died of internal bleeding, likely from a blow to the abdomen.

“It is accepted that the accused did not intend to kill the victim, nor did he subjectively appreciate that his actions could cause the victim bodily harm to a degree that was likely to cause death,” read the agreement statement of facts.

Semigak pleaded guilty to manslaughter.

Eye-opening treatment program offered

But it didn’t take his brother’s death alone to send Semigak on the path he’s on now.

He credits a 21-day Indigenous-specific trauma and addictions treatment program offered by the Natuashish Healing Lodge. He completed the program at the correctional centre as he waited to be sentenced.

Semigak said it was the first such program he saw offered in his time in jail.

And, he said, it changed everything.

"It made me realize I should be living life out there instead of in the correctional system, and it just made me realize who I was supposed to be, I guess, instead of being in the cracks in the justice system for this long," Semigak said. 

WATCH | Learn why Johannes Semigak feels the correctional system needs to make sweeping changes: 

Semigak said he just wishes it had been offered sooner.

"The justice system is playing with people's lives. They don't know what they're doing to Indigenous people," Semigak said. "They're just making them worse for when they get out."

Semigak said the correctional system needs sweeping changes, tailored to Indigenous people.

“It’s almost like residential school, I guess, [people] being forced from their homeland and being in the justice system," Semigak said.

Advocating for change

Now with a sober mind, Semigak has put pen to paper to advocate for himself and others. In October,  he collected the signatures of his fellow inmates for a letter asking that the jail’s carving program be reinstated. It has been sidelined during renovations at the jail, but the provincial government says the expansion of the jail will help improve programming.

The next month, he sent letters to the province’s health and justice ministers and the superintendent of prisons.

"There are things that I have experienced that have been really difficult and I don't want to see these kind of things keep happening to anyone else who is incarcerated," Semigak wrote to the minister of justice and minister of health and community services on Nov. 6.

"I feel that other people in government positions do not have the level of insight and knowledge that I do as someone who has directly been involved in the correctional system for a long time.”

On Jan. 9, Semigak received a reply from the minister of health and community services, who said Semigak’s perspective is important and suggested he meet with the minister of justice and public safety and minister of Indigenous affairs.

Semigak wants to see monthly addictions treatment programs focused on Indigenous culture, Inuttitut and Innu-aimun language classes and visits with elders from peoples' cultures.

Neither minister would agree to an interview with CBC News regarding the concerns raised in Semigak's letters. However, in a statement, Department of Justice spokesperson Eric Humber said the expansion of the Labrador Correctional Centre will create a stand-alone building for Indigenous programming, including carving.

"This additional space will play a key role in improving the interactions and experiences of Indigenous people within the justice system, by fostering and supporting Indigenous cultures and traditions," Humber wrote in an email.

Humber said construction is anticipated to be completed by the fall.

His advocacy was fuelled by encouragement from his mother, who visited him frequently until she was diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer.

On her final trip home, Semigak wasn't permitted to see her at the airport during her layover. She died in March 2023. Semigak asked to attend her funeral but was told staff needed to be on standby and he could not go.

"She was my best friend," Semigak said. "The justice system took something from me that I'm never going to get back. I never got to say goodbye to my mom.”

Semigak hopes to honour her in the future by making life better for inmates and elders alike. 

Semigak's story of trauma, addiction, suicide and complications with the justice system isn’t rare on Labrador’s north coast, according to Erin Broomfield, who works with Inuit offenders.

"There's not one person incarcerated who's not impacted by intergenerational trauma," said Broomfield, the Nunatsiavut government’s regional justice services co-ordinator.

Being jailed at a young age and removed from family, cultural foods and language can compound the trauma that people have, she said.

Semigak is part of a growing national movement  for more Indigenous-focused support for people in prison, Broomfield said.

"It's really a powerful thing. I like to see Inuit and Indigenous people taking more of a voice for themselves and speaking up and challenging any type of service or system that they don't feel is working for them," Broomfield said.

The impacts of colonialism have led to Indigenous people not knowing the power of their own voice, Broomfield said, despite the value of their experiences. 

Indigenous people make up only five per cent of the population in Canada but 32 per cent of federal inmates, according to Statistics Canada.

According to the provincial Justice Department, there were about 350 offenders incarcerated as of April 8 — 16 per cent of whom self-identified as Indigenous.

Indigenous people make up 9.3 per cent of the population in Newfoundland and Labrador.

Throughout his decades as a defence lawyer, Mark Gruchy says, he's seen only a small minority of people try to change the justice system for the better.

"I think it's good that people who are experiencing it would try to analyze it and suggest ways to improve it and reflect on it," Gruchy said in an interview at his St. John’s office.

"And I think there probably is no one better situated than an Indigenous person who's experiencing it."

For Semigak, that included pleading guilty and requesting a sentencing circle, to create distance from the practice of the colonial court institution.

The sentencing guidelines are no different from any other case, but the circle — a First Nations practice — provides the community space to take part.

‘You have to decide from your heart’

On March 20, Semigak arrived at the Nunatsiavut government building to a round circle of folding chairs.

Justice Stacy Ryan, the first Inuk justice on Newfoundland and Labrador’s Supreme Court, presided over the sentencing circle, sitting alongside lawyers, members of the community, and Semigak.

"I really am really sorry for what I done," Semigak said to the group.

"If it wasn't for alcohol, [it] wouldn't have happened. I'm sorry.… I take responsibility for everything, for what I done."

During the circle, Elder Sarah Ponniuk addressed Semigak directly.

"It's time you have to learn to forgive yourself. You cannot live in the past anymore. You have to move forward," Ponniuk said.

"And one of the things you have to decide [is] to quit alcohol altogether. But that's your choice. You have to decide from your heart."

Others in the circle pointed to the systemic issues Semigak faced, from growing up in care to a lack of mental health support and a revolving door of counsellors on the north coast.

"This situation is a symptom of something, and we keep thinking the symptom is the problem and it's not," said Darlene Winters, a Hopedale community member who came to support Semigak at the circle.

Winters said she and her husband have been coming to terms with their own intergenerational traumas, accepting the past and trying to create a better future.

"It's the beginning of healing and great change," said her husband, McKinley. "This is a great start to healing for our community and other communities as well."

"Just takes one to make a difference," Darlene adds.

Semigak dreams of opening a carving shop that would provide drop-in sessions for youth and people facing addictions.

"Tell their story for how they were grown up. Let them take it on the rock. Let them tell their story in the rock," Semigak said. 

Two weeks after the sentencing circle, Justice Ryan came down with her decision.

She sentenced Semigak to three and a half years in jail for his brother's death, plus two years’ probation. He has about six months left on his sentence.

As part of his conditions, Semigak has been ordered to perform 100 hours of community service helping elders in Hopedale and create a custom carving for the court.

The carving must depict what Semigak is like when drinking and what he is like when sober. It will then need to be presented to the court before being returned for him to display, a daily reminder of the past but also of the future.

"I want to break the cycle, what my father went through," Semigak said.

"I know I can break the cycle."

Producer : Ariana Kelland | Video : Curtis Hicks | Copy editor : Daniel MacEachern 

Cyclist reconsiders crossing Nullabor Plain for charity mid-journey after Eyre Highway death

Charissa Hanrahan gives one last push against the pedals and punches the air.

After weeks on the road, the 43-year-old has finally completed her mission of cycling 1,186 kilometres to raise money for child cancer research.

But the final route was far different to what she had imagined when she set out from Ceduna in South Australia to cycle across the Nullarbor.

Her message to anyone thinking of doing the same: "Rethink".

'Really quite scary'

Ms Hanrahan wanted to raise money for child cancer research after a close friend's daughter, Lucy Galvin, who is now in remission, was diagnosed with cancer.

With her wife and two daughters following along in a support vehicle, she set off to cycle the Nullarbor from Ceduna on March 17, 2024.

But she was startled by the traffic's intensity.

"It's incredible but frightening at the same time," Ms Hanrahan said.

"Every minute road trains were coming past.

"And the wind they throw off is really quite scary."

Less than a week into the journey, Ms Hanrahan was cycling towards Eucla when devastating news came through her UHF radio.

A cyclist, 62-year-old Chris Barker , who was taking part in the epic Indian Pacific Wheel Ride, had been hit by a truck and killed only slightly further west along the Eyre Highway.

Less than two hours later, another cyclist taking part in the same event was also hit by a vehicle and seriously injured.

A tough call

Ms Hanrahan pulled into Eucla that day at the same time as other Indian Pacific Wheel Ride participants, which she said was "quite confronting and emotional".

When she saw them putting their bikes on the back of a motorhome the next day, she questioned her plan.

"I thought to myself, if that's what they're doing, maybe I need to have a good, long, hard think about what I'm doing," Ms Hanrahan said.

After having a conversation with a truck driver about just how vulnerable cyclists and people in slow-moving support vehicles were, she finally made the call to stop her Nullarbor crossing.

"It was very difficult," Ms Hanrahan said.

"I did cry. There were a lot of emotions."

Safety in the spotlight

The first person to cycle across the Nullarbor was Arthur Richardson, who spent 28 days picking his way across rough tracks and sand dunes in 1896.

But these days, the biggest threat to cyclists is the traffic.

Recent flood damage to the Trans-Australian Railway, forcing freight onto the road, has left the remote highway particularly busy.

Western Roads Federation chief executive Cam Dumesny said the trucking industry was horrified by Mr Barker's death and met with peak cycling bodies this week to discuss ways to make the road safer.

From the trucking perspective, Mr Dumesny said they needed to be informed when large numbers of cyclists were expected.

He also said cyclists should know how difficult it was for a truck to suddenly swing around them.

"Cyclists are entitled to use the road, as are trucks," Mr Dumesny said.

"We've just got to be more respectful of each other.

"Our road toll continues to rise. We've got to do something."

A 'heartwarming' experience

Not all Nullarbor cycling experiences are negative.

Nicolai Bangsgaard is an extremely experienced long-distance adventurer, having cycled and scootered around 140,000 kilometres over the past 18 years across 87 different countries.

In March, the 47-year-old tackled the Nullarbor on a kick-scooter .

"Among long distance cyclists, it's in the top 10 or 20 crossings to do in the world," Mr Bangsgaard said.

He said the Eyre Highway was not busy when he went across in early March — possibly due to a flood closure — and he said he felt safe "almost 100 per cent of the time".

"I was positively surprised by the road trains," Mr Bangsgaard said.

"They gave me a wide berth all the time."

His extensive experience also helped, saying he always moved well off the road when two road trains were passing at the same time, and "held his line" when one was coming past.

His advice to any other cyclists or scooter-riders thinking of tackling the road: Get a rear-view mirror.

"I would never travel without a rear-view mirror," Mr Bangsgaard said.

"[That way] I'm in control."

He described the journey as having "a lot of monotony, nothingness and outback bushland".

Mr Bangsgaard said he recommended the journey, simply so others could experience the "heartwarming hospitality" of the people he met.

Finding a new path

Although Ms Hanrahan left the Nullarbor behind, she never abandoned her goal of cycling 1,186 kilometres.

She simply relocated, cycling lap after lap of the Esperance foreshore on a dedicated path to make up the remaining 612 kilometres.

"I'm just absolutely stoked to be finished," Ms Hanrahan said, pulling up on April 2.

After leaving the Nullarbor, she initially "felt like she'd failed".

But in hindsight, she is proud to have made what she believed was the right call for her safety and her family.

"It [opened my eyes] as to the way the family can operate as a team," Ms Hanrahan said.

She still achieved her goal too, with the adventure bringing in more than $15,000 in fundraising for child cancer research.

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Breaking news, dave mccarty, 2004 red sox world series champion, dead at 54.

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Former Red Sox player — and 2004 World Series champion — Dave McCarty died due to a “cardiac event” in California, the team announced Friday.

He was 54 years old.

The team released a statement Friday night, expressing sadness over the loss of the first baseman and outfielder who spent three seasons in Boston.

“Our hearts are heavy with the passing of Dave McCarty. Playing 3 seasons with the Red Sox, he will forever be a part of the curse-breaking 2004 World Series championship team. We send our love to his wife, Monica, and their children, Reid and Maxine,” the team shared on X .

Pitcher Lenny DiNardo, McCarty’s former teammate in Boston during the 2004 and 2005 seasons, also shared a message on social media.

“Just awful news. I was happy to be able to spend time with him at our reunion,” the former lefty pitcher wrote on X .

“Such a great guy. He’ll be missed. Hug your loved ones.”

Our hearts are heavy with the passing of Dave McCarty. Playing 3 seasons with the Red Sox, he will forever be a part of the curse-breaking 2004 World Series championship team. We send our love to his wife, Monica, and their children, Reid and Maxine. pic.twitter.com/TJZGqtm3pa — Red Sox (@RedSox) April 19, 2024

McCarty was first drafted by the Twins in the first round (third overall) of the 1991 MLB Draft out of Stanford to start his 11-year big league career.

He went on to play 630 games in the majors for seven different teams — the Twins (1993-95), Giants (1995-96), Mariners (1998), Royals (2000-02), Rays (2002), A’s (2003), and Red Sox (2003-05).

McCarty was a part of the Red Sox’s 2004 team, suiting up in 89 regular season games.

McCarty was present at Fenway Park when the team honored the late Tim Wakefield and celebrated the 20th anniversary of the 2004 World Series title, which was the team’s first in 86 years.

In his three seasons with Boston, McCarty held a .286 batting average and .794 OPS and tallied five home runs and 25 RBIs.

After retirement, he served as a NESN analyst from July 2005 through the end of the 2008 season.

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